Page 24 of You Were Always the One

‘Not true,’ I say quietly. ‘Anything is possible. You used to say that all the time.’

She doesn’t move. Then she looks up again. ‘I did, didn’t I? I used to believe it, too.’ She glances at her watch. ‘I really should be going home.’

‘Are you OK to drive?’

‘Fine.’ She shakes her head. ‘You didn’t really tell me about you and Emma,’ she says.

‘Next time.’ I wait for her to say, There isn’t going to be a next time. ‘In any case, there really isn’t much to tell.’

She gets up. ‘Walk me to my car?’ she says.

Outside, as we walk across the car park, the wind starts to pick up. We reach her car and a strand of her hair blows across her face as, without warning, she steps towards me. I gaze into her beautiful eyes as she moves closer. She hesitates for a moment. But then she kisses me. For real.

In the evening, my mind is all over the place. This afternoon, when Holly kissed me, it’s bizarre but it was exactly as I imagined it would be. Did I somehow know it was going to happen? Or did I manifest it into being? Which rather begs the question, if that’s so, is it possible for me to write the future of us?

So that’s what I try to do. For the next few hours, I go back to the beginning. Then I try to conjure how life could be if the two of us were together. If we had already learned from our mistakes of the past. If we finally found the life we’d dreamed of all those years ago. I even start to believe it could happen. In time – once Holly’s left Miles and we’re free to be together. As I said, all things are possible. It’s simply about timing.

But as I’m yet to find out, it’s a little more complicated than that.

TWENTY-ONE YEARS AGO

I wasn’t looking for anyone – I swear I wasn’t. On a sandy beach on the island of Corfu, I was a firm believer that life was so much simpler on my own. But then she appeared one afternoon. I watched her slip off her flip-flops before making her way across the sand. Dropping her bag, she stripped off her shorts and T-shirt to reveal a red bikini and long limbs; skin the colour of honey.

Such is the beauty of sunglasses, particularly mirrored, slightly iconic ones like mine, that you can watch someone from behind them, completely unobserved. And I make absolutely no excuses for unashamedly watching the girl’s every move, ascertaining whether or not she appeared to be a fellow solo traveller as she walked into the turquoise water.

Whatever my principles about life being better alone, they were negotiable. Not that I was about to rush into anything. In the end, I didn’t do anything at all. I was at the bar, ordering a beer, when she came over and stood next to me.

‘Hi.’ I smiled at her, taking in her long hair still damp from the water. I mean, what else could I have done?

‘Hello.’

One word – that was all it took. Her voice was like sunlight; the scent of her like summer. ‘D’you come here often?’ I joked.

She slid her sunglasses on top of her head and studied me. ‘Did you actually say that?’

‘It was a joke,’ I said, just to make sure she knew.

‘Thank fuck for that.’ She looked bemused and relieved at the same time.

Just then, the bartender came over. He and I were on first name terms, mostly due to the fact that I’d spent most of the last fortnight here, plus I’d bought him a few drinks. ‘Monty? The usual?’

‘Yeah. Thanks.’ I turned to the girl. ‘Can I get you a drink?’

‘A beer would be great.’ The corners of the girl’s lips twitched. ‘Your name’s Monty?’ she asked, this gorgeous-looking girl whose eyes seemed to see into my soul.

‘Guilty as charged.’

‘I’m Skye.’ Her hand was delicate, ring-bedecked.

Taking it in mine, I kissed it.

Of course, after I mentally kicked myself. People didn’t go around kissing each other’s hands any more. But Skye hadn’t seemed to mind. Sitting at the bar, she told me about her travels.

‘This is my fifth Greek island – I can’t seem to leave here! But I have to – I have a ferry booked. I came here with all these places I wanted to see,’ she explained. ‘Now’s the time, isn’t it?’ She shrugged. ‘Before there’s a job and a mortgage and kids…’ She seemed to have it all worked out. ‘It isn’t the same then, is it? Life changes.’

‘Only if you let it.’ I had an abject fear of anything like that happening to me. In fact, I was determined to make sure it didn’t – at least, not for a very long time. ‘There’s a whole lot of life to live first.’

She perused me, frowning slightly. ‘That’s exactly how I feel.’ She smiled again, her beautiful eyes gazing into mine.