Page 54 of Ruthless Deliverance

Creed lets out a humorless laugh as Beau’s panic rises, his eyes bulging as Creed’s fingers tighten around his neck. Beau looks like he’s about to pass out, and I can’t feel sorry for him. But Creed releases him before he’s completely out, and Beau crumbles to the ground.

It’s over. But I know it’s just beginning for me. Because now I have to make sense out of it all. And the hardest thing to believe other than a lie is the truth. And this truth has been ruthless in its deliverance and ripped my heart completely out of my chest. How do I wrap my mind around a brutal truth that is harder to comprehend than any lie ever will be?

48

CREED

ONE WEEK LATER

I watch her from a distance. I know she needed space, but fuck, there’s only so much I can give her. I even asked Philip what to do. He’s been there for her in the last week since all the horrid details about her dad have come out. Me, I’m facing some charges that Philip said will be dismissed under the circumstances. But even so, I’ll shoot the motherfucker again. Don’t believe the thought hasn’t crossed my mind more than a few times. More than anything, though, it’s Beau who I want to hurt the most. I still want to put my fist through his skull. I know she can take care of herself, but she shouldn’t have to. And I fear she’ll never allow me to.

She has her earbuds in, totally zoned in on her workout as she hammers her gloved fist into the heavy bag. Her movements are strong and steady, anyone can tell she’s in her element. Even after all the shit that’s happened, she feels safe here. And I’m about to disrupt that. Even if she kicks my ass, at least I’ll get a few minutes to attempt to make things right. Although, I don’t know what right is at this point.

Moving around the room, I make my way to the bag, gripping the sides of it to stabilize it as she lands one more solid blow before stepping back and removing a glove, then plucking her earbuds out. “You shouldn’t be here.”

“Well, I needed a good workout, and this was the most appealing gym around.”

“Too bad, members only.”

She goes to replace her earbud as I inform her. “Good thing I’m a member.”

She leans around me, glancing to where Gus is standing near the counter. “Seriously?”

Peeking back, I see he’s flashing a smile her way. “Yes. He even gave me the welcome tour.”

Her sarcastic laugh fills my ears and the smirk on her face makes this impromptu visit worth it, even if it doesn’t go my way. I still have hope that it might since she’s still smiling, even if she’s still standoffish and maybe a little pissy with my presence, when she says, “Now I know you’re lying because Gus doesn’t do welcome tours.”

“He made an exception for me. It consisted of him pointing around here and saying if I hurt you, every guy in this place will cut me.”

She closes her eyes and shakes her head. “Now that sounds like the truth.” As she puts her gloves back on, she mutters, “I can’t do this yet.”

Her frustration, sarcasm, everything. It’s gone. Defeat. That’s what I sense from her, and it makes me want to disintegrate. She’s stronger than the bullshit. “I understand. I just needed to tell you something.”

Reluctantly, she yanks the gloves off and drops them to the mat, then folds her arms across her chest, her eyes not meeting mine. “What?”

Well, the frustration is back. And I can handle that. Her. She’s bracing herself. I’ve tried to do the same. But it’s impossible. Whatever this is isn’t going away, and she needs to know how I feel.

“I have one.”

“One what?” she asks impatiently, still not meeting my eyes.

Stepping to her, I hook my finger under her chin, lifting her eyes to meet mine. “Fear.” Her wide eyes search for a few seconds before she whispers, “What is it?”

“You.” Moving my hand over her cheek, I lean down, giving her a soft kiss while she’ll allow it. “When I thought I’d lost you, I realized there was nothing I wouldn’t do to get you back. Control—it wasn’t mine. Because it was you.”

“Creed, we can’t.”

“Give me one good reason, and I’ll walk away.”

“You’re in high school.”

“Only through this term. I’m finishing early and going to Haine University starting in the spring. I have enough credits to graduate and was already accepted for an early admission. And if I decide to wait, I’ll start next fall. Haine was always on my list, being so close to Radon, and since there’s this great gym I found in Sunland, there’s no other uni on my list.”

“But you’re going to miss walking at graduation, prom, all of it.”

“I’m already missing out because Ethan won’t be at any of those events. Even football. I talked to Coach and told him I couldn’t do it anymore, not without my best friend. It’s meaningless. So, let’s hear another excuse.”

“You shot my dad.” Her eyes dart away from mine, but there’s no anger in her voice. It’s more of an astonished fact she’s still trying to understand.