Page 47 of Mercy & Malice

“Yes,” I admit. “But maybe I question why you’d voluntarily be with the loser.”

“Loser according to who?” She pauses then realizes I’m not responding and demands, “Answer me.”

Myself, my father, reality. “I lost the fight. That makes me the loser.”

“You picked a fight out of spite. Neither of you walked away a winner.” She huffs, her eyes searching around my bedroom. “And I have a feeling this stupid game will end the same way. Is it really worth it?”

“Who the fuck knows,” I mumble.

She turns back to me as she softly asks, “Why didn’t you ask me to come over last night? Or come to the party? Remy said he asked you to come and Cain said he did too.”

“What were you hoping for?” I tease before I add, “I figured I’d make it easy on you since Daddy wouldn’t approve.”

She avoids looking at me as she says, “Stop saying that.”

“Give me a good reason.”

Her chin tilts up. “I don’t have to do what you say. You’re the one who has to obey me.”

I leisurely drop to my knees in front of her, keeping my eyes locked with hers as my fingers trail up her thighs. I slowly part her legs to move between them, then lean in until my lips are near hers. “What’s your request? I’m yours to command.”

She turns her face slightly, but just enough to avoid my mouth as I whisper in her ear, “You still can’t admit what you want.”

Standing up, I grab my phone and go to leave. I expect her to yell or something, but when I catch a glimpse of her, she’s in the same position. Her eyes avoid me as she says, “If it were up to me, we’d be together. But it’s not. I know you can do whatever you want without consequences or fear, but that’s not me. I have to follow the rules my father has in place no matter how much it hurts me to not be with you.”

I feel like a bigger ass than usual. “I’m not asking you to run away with me, Brooke.”

“You don’t know what you’re asking from me. What you’re truly wanting me to do.” She is off the bed and heading to the door. “You should figure out why you always want more than I can give and won’t just be happy with what we have.”

Hurrying behind her, I slam the door closed before she can walk through it by reaching around her. “Because I want you. All of you, not some half-ass, meaningless friendship that neither of us are happy with. That’s not what you want either.”

Her shoulders stay tense, her sight straight ahead on the door. “I want to leave.”

There’s no choice but for me to remove my hand and let her go. When she goes to step out the door, I gently grasp her arm, and she flinches at the contact. I release her but she doesn’t move as I ask, “Why are you scared of me?”

Brooke hoarsely answers, “It’s not you.”

“You can leave if you want. Or you can stay.” Slowly, I move behind her, not touching her. “Make me tell you what I want.”

“No,” she mutters.

Leaning forward, I move her hair off her shoulder, pressing my lips just behind her ear. “Please.”

I don’t want her to go. Every part of me wanted her to stay away when I had control of her. And now that’s she’s in command; all I want is for her to willingly stay.

Her body relaxes as she leans into me, and I trail my mouth over her neck, my arm around her waist as I pull her closer to me.

She whispers, “Micah, I’m scared if we take it there, neither of us will be able to deal with the aftermath. I can’t give you what you want. Sex means something different to me. It’s not just physical and meaningless or some itch I need to scratch with whoever is convenient.”

I keep focus on savoring her as I ask, “How many times do I have to explain to you that I don’t want anyone else?”

“You’ll change your mind when the newness wears off and I’m not off-limits anymore. You can sleep with anyone you want and still get off.”

The fact that she believes this makes me want to put my fist through the wall. That’s how she sees herself. A tool to be used and discarded. I rotate her to face me. “Ask me how many women I’ve fucked, and I’ll have to tell you the truth.”

She quickly shakes her head. “I don’t want to know. Thinking about you with someone else is bad enough, knowing the count would be horrifying. That’s yet another reason I don’t want to be just a number on your roster.”

I can’t help but laugh at her assumption (and enjoy her confusion) before I admit the truth. “You’d be the first and only.”