Page 105 of Golden Ruin

Now, it’s clear. Nothing’s being broken tonight. It’s being repaired, pieced back together one breath at a time, one touch at a time.

There’s this ache in my chest as I hold in how I feel, wanting to confess every-fucking-thing as I get reacquainted with her body. I push my hand up her ribs as my tongue flicks her nipple, feeling how she responds to me—bowing her back, biting her lip, breathing heavier.

She stills as I undo three more buttons and kiss lower, below her navel. Her stomach quivers, and I peer up when I feel her watching me. I see in her eyes that she’s suddenly thinking too much, so my mouth slows as I stroke her hip. I’m just about to question what’s wrong, but I notice things before she even speaks.

How she’s blinking more, like she’s nervous. How she just placed a hand over her stomach. How she’s reaching for the buttons I just undid.

“I just… I have marks there,” she says. “From having Jax.”

My heart picks up speed, staring only at her eyes. I could tell her none of that matters to me, could tell her she’s probably more beautiful now than she was years ago, but she’s never been the type to believe in something because of words.

So, instead of talking, I show her.

Her breathing kicks up when I slowly pull her hand away, lowering my gaze to the faint, pink lines on her skin, marks that she hates, but as I stare at them, the only thing I feel is grateful. She carried our son, made my life matter.

Her skin is warm when I kiss her there, taking my time. She trembles a little, but I feel the tension leaving her body as she relaxes.

“You don’t have to hide from me,” I breathe over her skin, kissing her again. “Not anything. Ever.”

Her fingers move into my hair, and I think I’ve made my point clear. She’s back in this moment with me, no longer overthinking things that don’t matter.

“Sterling,” she whines when my mouth settles lower, between her legs, kissing her pussy over her shorts.

“Can I take these off?” I groan, breathless and impatient while I wait for her response, but she nods quickly.

“Yeah.”

My fingers loop into her waistband almost immediately, tugging the shorts down as she raises her hips just enough for me to remove them. I sit straight up to pull them down the rest of the way, then toss them behind the couch with my shirt.

My chest and stomach are only halfway on the cushion now, and I’m mostly kneeling on the floor as I push Lexi’s thighs apart, lowering my mouth to her pussy. Instinct tells me to dive in, to eat the absolute fuck out of her until she cries, but I remind myself to take things slowly.

I press a kiss to her thigh, and she shudders, staring down her body as I move to the other side, kissing there too. But this feels like torture, and I can’t keep this up much longer.

Her lips are slick, coated with her juices when I open them, pressing a soft kiss to her clit. Her head falls back, so I do it again to get another reaction. I lick slowly, only now realizing how clearly I remember the taste of her. Her thighs tense as her hips roll, and fuck, I want to eat her alive.

Air hisses between her teeth when I stop being so gentle, wrapping my lips around her clit, sucking softly. She grips my hair as I slip two fingers inside her, pumping in rhythm as I suck, fighting the urge to go faster, fighting the urge to rush her to come because I love seeing her fall apart, but I hold back. She’s panting when I flash a look up her torso to see her face.

Her eyes are locked on mine as I curl my fingers, pressing against her walls. She squeezes her tits, and I suction her clit tighter, watching as she tries to lift her hips from the couch. I’m quick to press my free hand down on her stomach, forcing her to stay in place, forcing her to endure the friction, the sucking that’s about to finish her off.

“Sterling, I–”

Her words cut off when she loses her breath.

“Fuck,” she whimpers, and I slip a third finger inside, twisting them as I suck harder.

Her hips rock, moving to her own rhythm as she chases her orgasm, and it’s fucking hot as hell.

“Fuck,” she moans again, but it’s a strangled sound, and I can feel her clenching around me. I suck harder when she cries out, watching in awe as she unravels right before my eyes. She arches off the couch again, lowering one hand to my hair, pulling hard, but I don’t care. I love every second of it, actually.

Pushing her over the edge.

Fucking her with my fingers until her body goes limp.

Her eyes are glazed, and she’s struggling to keep them open when I drag her closer to me. She sighs, and I kiss her hip, working my way up her body. Both her hands fall from my hair, and her breath hitches when I kiss between her tits, moving to swirl my tongue over her nipple, then the side of her neck.

She moans into the kiss when I make it back to her mouth, and she reaches between us, pushing her hand down my sweats. Electricity shoots through me because that’s the effect her touch has.

Back then.