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I search his eyes and see the truth in them.

I want to believe him. But I also don’t want to be the person that lets them get away because I don’t remember what they did.

Jack’s nose nuzzles the back of my head. He stretches against me, not releasing me.

“Hey.” His voice is deep with sleep.

“You wouldn’t let her go, brother.” Caden’s gaze lifts from mine.

Jack stiffens against me but still doesn’t release me.

I breathe them in, feeling protected and safe here in this moment with both of them. Knowing they won’t let anything happen to me.

But something did happen.

Jack’s hold loosens a little, and I roll to my back. His blue eyes lower to mine, and I cup his cheek.

“Sorry, sweetheart.” He brushes his lips across mine. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

All day yesterday, everyone asked if I was okay. The words are on the tip of my tongue to ask Jack, but every time someone asked, it felt weird. So I shake it out of my mind.

“If you need to hold me, I’m not against it, Jack,” I say softly.

His lips tug up on one side, and his blue eyes twinkle. “I mean, you are kind of against it.” He lowers his gaze, and I follow it to the bulge in his boxers.

My face heats.

“Just chemistry, little nympho.” Caden runs his fingers down my neck. “You both need a shower. We’re going out for breakfast. Get a lay of the land.”

A shiver rushes through me. I’m not immune to the little touches, but no one’s pressed for more. And while I’d love to celebrate life now, the mood is definitely not right.

Jack sits up and runs a hand through his already tousled hair before turning and holding his other hand back to me. “Shower with me?”

I slip my hand into his and let him lead me to the bathroom. Caden doesn’t follow us, and I’m not sure where the others are. Maybe they’re getting ready too.

Would I be more panicked about them not being here if I could remember? I sigh as Jack turns on the shower. He arches an eyebrow my way and straightens at whatever he sees on my face.

“I want to remember. Even if it hurts, Jack.” I don’t know how to explain it any other way.

He steps in close and tips my chin up. He studies me as I wait for him to tell me it’s better that I don’t remember. Instead, he gives me a slight nod and reaches for the hem of my shirt.

I’m too used to them undressing me. We remove the bandages off my feet and check the wounds the way Mom told us to. I didn’t require stitches, but my feet were pretty banged up. When they seem fine, he quickly gets me naked, and I help him out of his boxers before following him into the shower. He hands me the shampoo and wets his hair. This is also familiar. Safe.

When I hand it back to him, he puts some in his palm before setting the bottle down.

I’m working the shampoo into my hair as he begins.

“You saw Sidney on stage?”

I nod remembering the video.

“The guys who came with Ashley and Hannah were at the table during Sidney’s speech. Once the court was announced and the dancing began, they set off a smoke bomb. The sprinklers went off. The lights went out. They had some sort of flash bang or fireworks they were setting off. For a second we thought it was guns, but thankfully it wasn’t. Guys in masks moved through the crowd. Searching.”

I shiver. Just hearing about it freaks me out. He pulls me under the water flow to rinse my hair out. I can almost picture the panic. The crowd rushing in chaos, trying to escape.

“Eli had you. Caden and Luke surrounded the two of you, but they were being overtaken by the masked guys. Nico was on the outside of the building, trying to clear a path to safety. I was on the inside. The boys’ locker room.”

I take the conditioner as Jack rinses his hair. Why can’t I remember that? Is it all the drugs? They said I had a bad reaction to the combination. Maybe I’ll never remember.