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They weren’t dissimilar, Nolan and Freddie, in the way they formed attachments and felt like they stood outside the group. Nolan had probably read Freddie’s letters and subconsciously found a kindred spirit. Eli had hoped his conversations with the history professor and/or Professor Waugh would be the ace in the hole—he knew how much finding Freddie meant to Nolan, and he’d wanted to give Nolan the answers he craved. Preferably Freddie’s full name and address.

“You look like that’s not what you wanted to hear,” Professor Waugh said.

“It’s not me I’m worried about,” Eli admitted as he rose. “Thank you for this. Really. It was super helpful.”

“Let me know if you find Freddie, will you?” Waugh asked with a small laugh. “You’ve got me curious.”

“Sure.”

“And good luck against Arizona tonight. Don’t let the last few games get into your head, okay? A sophomore slump is only as strong as you let it be.”

“You know about that,” Eli said weakly, cheeks flushing. “How wonderful.”

Waugh’s smile was kind. “Can I give you a little advice? One professional to another?”

“Sure,” Eli said, aware his own smile probably looked more like a grimace.

“Close your eyes for me.”

He sent Waugh a narrow-eyed look, but Waugh simply sent one right back, so Eli closed his eyes.

“Without thinking too hard about it, tell me what the funnest hockey game you’ve ever played is.”

“Groundbreakers vs. Wildstars, three years ago,” Eli said instantly.

“Tell me about it.”

“It was an outdoor game. In New Hampshire. In fucking winter.” Eli bounced on his toes. “The idea was taken from the Toronto team—they have community-focused outdoor practices every winter. Except someone higher up on the AHL food chain decided to make ours a game, and holy hell, we were freezing. Like, we were hot, obviously, because we were playing a game. But our faces were frozen, our noses kept running, the wind kept sneaking into places we didn’t think it could given how much gear we were wearing, and our toes. Jesus fucking Christ. Skates have zero insulation, let me tell you. But man, we had a blast.” He chuckled, recalling his teammates’ red noses and chapped lips. “The fans were right there, pressed up against the temporary boards that had been set around the rink. It was a daytime game, and the kids had signs and there were people walking around passing out hot chocolates. It was awesome.” Eli opened his eyes and chuckled. “Terrible, but also awesome.”

“That feeling you just described,” Waugh said. “Of community and friendship and team spirit. That’s what I want you to focus on tonight. Forget everything else. I know hockey’s a business, and at the end of the day, you need to win games. But it’s also supposed to be fun. Remember that, and everything else will fall into place.”

As he stood outside Dewey Hall a few minutes later, Eli wasn’t sure he believed Waugh, but he set it aside for now and called Nolan.

Shit, wait. This should be a face-to-face conversation, not⁠—

“Hey.” Nolan’s voice was warm in his ear. “How’d it go with the psychology professor?”

“Uh . . .” Eli scratched his forehead and began walking back to his car. “It was informative, that’s for sure.” He told Nolan everything Waugh had told him about the assignment, and when he finished, Nolan remained quiet on the other end of the line for so long that Eli stopped walking.

“Dude,” another student grumbled from behind him. “In the middle of the sidewalk?” He brushed past Eli with a huff.

Ignoring him, Eli said, “Did I break you?” into the phone.

“I’m . . .” Nolan went silent again.

See, this was why this should’ve been an in-person conversation. So Eli could see Nolan’s expression.

“Freddie’s letters were an assignment?” Nolan asked, sounding almost hurt by the revelation.

“Yeah.”

Eli wanted to tell Nolan it didn’t change anything. It didn’t change who Freddie was or what his struggles were or how he felt compelled to risk it all with Annie but not with his teammates.

But maybe Nolan needed to figure that out on his own.

“I need to think about this,” Nolan eventually said.

That was such an expected response that Eli smiled. “That doesn’t surprise me. Listen, I’m almost at my car. I’ll see you at the arena soon.”