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“Every time my father would leave to fight, he would tell my mother he loved her and she would respond with, forevermore. That’s it. Nothing more than that single word.”

The visual of my mother looking into his eyes as she spoke those words springs a feeling of unrest inside of me, as they were the same words she whispered to his empty casket during his funeral.

“I hated when she said it. It always felt like such a copout to me. Like she was trying to avoid saying she loved him back. Wasn’t that, at all, though. She was merely telling him that death wasn’t the end of her love for him. That she would see him again in the afterlife.” I study our entwined fingers and plant a kiss against his knuckles. “I realized how much more powerful those words were. How powerful her faith that he’d return to her, one way, or another. I haven’t decided whether or not I believe in Heaven. All I know is, if you don’t return, I’ll surely know hell exists.

Chapter 37

I carry the oversized pot to the stove and set it atop the glowing burner. I’ve only managed to scrounge up three canteens, but stumbled upon a couple of empty liquor jugs in the shed. Titus set out for the fuel early this morning, which leaves me gathering supplies for our journey. Four-hundred miles will only be a day’s drive, but my father always told me to prepare for the worst. And the worst might be that the vehicle breaks down and we have to travel by foot.

I open the oven door to remove the tray of venison meat I’ve dried, and set the hot pan on a stacked towel atop the counter. This, along with some berries I gathered earlier, should be enough food and water for a few days.

Keeping to task distracts my mind from Titus. I don’t even want to imagine him not returning. Physically, I’d learn to survive out here, but mentally and emotionally, I don’t know how I’d fare. The feelings I’ve developed for the Alpha in the last couple of weeks is unlike anything I’ve experienced before. While I’ve had crushes and dated a couple of boys in Szolen, it was more for my mother’s sake than my own. Women are meant to produce children, after all, not pursue other endeavors, such as my desires to become a physician. She always encouraged me to leave the fruitless passions, as she called them, to the men.

If not for my Nan, and her sharp wisdom and influence, I can’t even imagine what my life would be right now. Probably screwing some man, while his wife pretends to be happy about it. Nothing but an empty vessel, until the church eventually finds out that I can’t physically carry a child to term. My body is nothing more than a death trap for a baby.

Movement through the window out of the corner of my eye steels my muscles.

It’s too early for Titus. And where the hell is Yuma?

I duck low and stalk toward the drawer with the knives, sliding one out carefully before tiptoeing across the wooden floor toward the front door, just as Titus did.

The knob twists.

My stomach turns. Muscles tense, primed for attack.

The figure steps inside, and I swipe out, only grazing an arm.

“Hey! What the fuck!” The familiar voice skates down my spine, as I stare back at Lilith cradling her new cut. “Crazy bitch!”

“What the hell are you doing here?” The words hardly push past my clenched teeth, as I inch toward her with the knife still leading the way.

“Calm down. I’m not here for Titus. I’m here to make a truce. With you.”

“I don’t believe a word of that.”

“Another one of our girls turned Rager. One of the men we held captive escaped. One of the children from our village passed away from pneumonia. All in the span of a day since you left. My mother believes it’s a bad omen based on bad blood between you and me. She insisted that I make it right.”

Lowering my knife, I roll my eyes. “Then, you’re not here out of the kindness of your own heart, but your mother’s.”

The way her eyes scan the room proves my point.

“He’s not here.”

“He left you?” The intrigue in her voice taunts my temper.

“He ran out for supplies.”

Shoulders sagging, she huffs and plops down on a nearby chair.

“Make yourself at home, why don’t ya,” I mutter, returning to the kitchen to check on the boiling water. “Why did you really come here?”

“I told you why. We rely on our good fortune to survive. Why do you think we sacrifice the men?”

“Because you’re all psychotic?”

Snorting a laugh, she shakes her head and tugs a knife from her pocket, using it to clean her fingernails. “You haven’t lived out here long enough. You don’t know the dangers we face.”

“Yes, you’re right. I’ve floated through the last few weeks unscathed. Like an angel.”