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“Ju first gift is outside right about now, go see and Luv record him for me please so I can have a good laugh.” I could hear the stress in his voice. Whenever the cartel seemed to be stressing Roberto, he’d let it be known or his distance would let us all know that shit was rough back in Mexico.

I took the phone from Luv and took it off speaker. Walking out the kitchen and into my den, I told Roberto that I was now alone and asked him if he was straight.

“Of course, I’m okay. It’s nothing major that my all-pink Ak-forty-seven can’t fix chile. Now stop worrying about me and go give Luv the phone so she can record you.” Letting it go not pressing him for information, I walked back into the kitchen shaking my head at Roberto. I was kind of scared to see what he got for me this year.

The nigga had more money than me so he never came up short when it came to him gifting me with things I didn’t really need.

I took another bite of my food, and walked towards the front of my house. Opening the door, I smiled big at the all-green Lamborghini parked right in front. A couple of seconds later a Lincoln Limousine pulled up, the driver stepped out first and opened the back door. Two blindfolded big booty strippers stood next to each other holding up signs that said “What one wife won’t do, a million side chicks would love to do.” I looked around hoping Jocelyn was still getting dressed for the day so she couldn’t see what was taking place.

About five other big booty strippers got out the car, two were topless and the others had on thongs with pink stickers barely covering their nipples. I couldn’t help but chuckle and smile big because Roberto was sick as fuck with it. The music played and I couldn’t even believe the lyrics.

“I’m out of town, thuggin’ with my rounds! My coochie pink, my booty hole brown! Where the niggas? Come looking for the hoes! Quit playing nigga, come suck a bitch toe!”

The strippers’ asses were popping effortlessly with their hands on their knees as Luv start jumping and dancing singing the raunchy lyrics to “Pound town” By Sexy Red. The stripper who I assumed as the leader did the splits, making her booty jump to the beat had me in a trance. These females were cornfed and it amazed me how they were even able to do all of this with blindfolds on.

The blindfold idea had to come from Roberto, so they wouldn’t know the location of my home. I took my attention off the strippers and could see three big body Benzes coming up the drive way. The first person to jump out was Roberto and I dropped my head at what this nigga had on. His wild hair wasn’t in a ponytail today the shit was out blowing in the wind like crazy. This nigga had on an all-pink short set tuxedo, the shorts stopped above his knees with a light pink vest that looked too tight.

He had on all-pink Gucci socks that stopped below his knee, and to top his outfit off, he rocked a long mink pink coat that swept the dirty ground. His neck, ears and wrist were shining. That silly smirk on his face looked pleased to see the strippers getting ratchet for me. Sovereign hopped out the second Benz with balloons as one of her guards popped the trunk pulling out lots of designer bags.

I couldn’t even deny how good they made me feel, to see my family turned up and happy to celebrate a special day had me feeling high and I hadn’t even smoked any weed.

“Pound town! Just left pound town! With my nigga, he just took a bitch down! Yeah, that nigga dick a bitch down! Yeah, that nigga eat me out!” Roberto started dancing with the strippers, popping the rubber bands to his bank roll of money. Throwing it up in the air, letting the money rain all over them.

I couldn’t move from my spot on the porch because by now I’m sure Jocelyn was somewhere watching and I didn’t want to disrespect her. I appreciated the fuck out of the strippers and the way their asses were moving. Sovereign made her way to my steps with her security right behind her. She pointed towards my open door, and they walked past us, to put all my gifts inside the house.

“Happy birthday, Teddy. Roberto beat me with the gifts this year but we celebrating all day.” She grabbed me for an embrace, and I hugged her tight, happy that she always came through for me no matter what.

“Good looking sis, you know I appreciate everything y’all do for me even though I feel like its too much man.” That was the truth, real fucking family of mine. Sovereign and Roberto always went the extra mile for me. I appreciated them so much, no questions asked I lay my life down for them. We watched Roberto who now had his hands on his hips as a stripper clapped her ass on him.

“That’s right Uncle Berto! Get that shit for thatttttt!!!!” Luv was too pumped up, more excited than me. The funny part about it was, Roberto couldn’t dance to save his life. He loved dancing but was always offbeat.

The horrible song finally went off and the strippers retreated back inside of the limousine with the help of Roberto and the driver.

“Luv, come help pick up all this money for the girls.” Roberto was out of breath fanning himself.

“Wheeewww, I need a drank!” He slapped my shoulder and told me happy birthday. I took a long look at the new whip he bought and nodded my head. It was on my list of things to get after I won the Superbowl, I should’ve known once I mentioned it Roberto was going to buy it.

We all went back inside the house and sat in the living room, reflecting and laughing at Roberto.

“Di one stripper with cellulite all over her booty, had me in love! I mean that’s all real ass. I need to get her information and make her a wife for that!” He was serious, but it made me laugh because Roberto love saying “For that” To make his point clear. He said the shit so much he had my sisters and Sovereign saying it.

“See this Chica ain’t hitting on shit with those cheap name brand clothes and shoes she got ju. I got ju a Lamborghini truck, dropped two hundred thousand. I wipe my ass with that, for that!” He snapped his fingers as Sovereign pulled out her iPad out of her purse with a sneaky look. These two loved out doing each other in anything, especially when it came to gifts. Most of the time it was too overwhelming, I felt like the little brother stuck inside of the big siblings’ competitions.

“Teddy, I did out do this ass clapping bitch.” Roberto fake grabbed at his neck and gasped hard like he was offended. Fanning himself dramatically with his long French tip nails, he flicked her off then rolled his eyes. Sovereign asked for the remote to my TV then tapped at her iPad until it was mirroring my TV.

The first picture that popped up had my mouth drying up, as she jumped up and danced a little with a big grin on her face. I was lost for words as she spoke.

“Me and hubby dropped big big M’s for thatttttt!!!” She looked over at Roberto as he gagged and looked on with a big smile.

“French style Chateau mansion baby with a big ass pool in the front and in the mutha fuckin back. We had to upgrade you!”

“Queen, you know I can’t take this.” She smacked her lips as I shook my head no.

“You can use this for you, Inferno and the kids.” I stated seriously.

“Don’t disrespect me! Inferno and I just had a new mansion built. You know my baby likes burning shit so our shit is set up perfectly for him. What you don’t like it?” She frowned and I quickly stood to my feet and hugged her to show my appreciation.

“Awww! I’m still mad for that but I love y’all let me get in on the love.” Roberto put his arms around both of us. Breaking apart, I wiped at my tears.