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“You okay if I go?”

Nora nods. “Elias will distract him. They like to talk about fishing boats together. Go, Dad.”

My chest hurts at hearing her call me Dad again. It’s a word I’ll never tire of hearing.

I make my way into the kitchen, determined to get Sandy to understand.

We’re a family now.

Better late than never.

And I’m going to do everything in my power to erase her guilt so she can feel the absolute joy that I do.

She’s standing by the stove, gripping a wooden spoon so hard, I’m surprised it hasn’t splintered in her grip.

“Come here, sweet Sandy.”

Without a second of hesitation, she drops the spoon onto the counter with a clatter and collapses into my embrace.

Right where she belongs.

5

sandy

“I was bamboozled by you.”

I forgot how good it felt to be in Upton Asbury’s arms.

Too good.

Like you could stay wrapped up in them forever.

It’s shameful that I’m receiving comfort from the man I should be comforting. My emotional trauma caused all this in the first place.

I really should find a good, local therapist.

“Hey,” Upton croons, warm breath tickling my hair. “It’s okay. We’re going to figure this out together.”

His words are binding. I know them to be truth. He’s never lied or deceived me. It’s the only way I’m able to suck in a deep breath, dry my eyes, and force a smile onto my trembling lips.

My mental drama will have to take a backseat. Tonight is about formally introducing a father and daughter for the first time. I refuse to take this precious time away from them when I’ve already stolen so much.

Upton watches me with a fierce, worried stare that melts my heart a little. He’s always been such a good man. I’m blown away no woman ever snatched him up.

You didn’t…

I manage to pull myself together enough to get our meal onto the table. Dad’s wheelchair is pushed up to one end of the table. It’s where Mom said he sat when they were first together. Neither of us ever took that seat. Elias sits in Mom’s old place which I’m grateful for. If Nora would have taken that spot, it would have only confused Dad. I sit between my dad and Upton. Nora is beside Elias and across from her father. They chatter happily, their relationship easy and warm. A few times while we eat, I start to get emotional, but a comforting pat on my thigh by Upton’s hand calms my erratic heart.

After dinner, Elias helps me clean up so Nora and Upton can spend some more time together. When Nora and Elias finally go home, Upton lingers. I don’t bid him goodbye but instead focus on getting Dad ready for bed.

Thirty minutes later, after changing into some cozy Christmas pajamas, I find Upton sitting on the sofa, shoes gone and his body relaxed.

Warmth trickles through me at the thought of us being alone together. For so many years, I ached for a time like this. I wanted it so badly. But I was afraid of my heart getting broken and bailed before it could.

“Made some hot cocoa,” Upton says, gesturing to two steaming hot mugs on the coffee table. “Come sit with me.”

I make my way over to him and sit far closer to him than I should. The heat from his body burns through his dark jeans and into my flannel pajama bottoms despite us not actually touching. He leans forward to grab the mugs and then hands me one.