Page 105 of Unapologetic Love Story

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her snugly against him. ‘I barked at that guy in the supermarket like I bark at everyone.’

‘You don’t bark at me,’ she whispered.

‘It’s like,’ he spoke slowly, untangling the feelings in his mind with careful precision, ‘since the cancer . . . everything feels like a potential threat. I never saw Mum’s disease coming. So now, I’m this hyper-vigilant dog, sitting out in the cold, barking at the wind.’

He said it with such sad and empty bitterness that Raina squeezed her eyes tightly shut at his words, trying to fight the sudden threat of tears. She stroked the sides of his face with her fingers, aching at the forlorn look on his face.

‘You can come in now, Tom,’ she said softly. His jaw was tight with emotion but his eyes looked at her with such longing. ‘It’s okay. You don’t have to be so strong with me, honey.’

‘But how do I keep you safe from what just happened? How do I stop it from happening again?’

‘You can’t,’ she told him honestly, as he pressed kisses to her face. ‘Just be here during the storm. You can’t change the weather, but you can be the shelter.’

‘Always,’ he said hoarsely. He kissed her and then pulled away, as if telling himself that he shouldn’t. Raina put his hands on her body and kissed him herself. A soft, wet kiss full of everything she was feeling.

‘Sweetheart,’ he groaned. ‘We shouldn’t—’

‘I don’t feel like talking,’ she responded bluntly.

She wanted to escape everything and just experience herself, and him, in this moment. All of the expectations and the judgements of being a woman who was just trying to exist slipped away with each touch from him. She fell back onto the carpet and he moved on top of her.

Whatever she had with Tom Branimir, it wasn’t just a mere distraction. It wasn’t purely escape. It was something deeper.

He made her laugh. He made her come apart.

He’d reintroduced her to the version of herself she liked the very most. Her mind felt awake and appreciated, firing on all cylinders in a way it couldn’t with other people.

‘I love y—your body.’

He said the words and they were broken up with shallow breaths, as they undressed each other.

She knew what he’d really been readying himself to say.

She felt it, too.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

As Raina and her sister arrived at the grand Surrey mansion, Raina had to admit it was easy to fall into the fantasy of Pepper’s unbelievable life. The two sisters were led to one of nine guest bedrooms. Named the Blue Room, it was the size of their parents’ ground floor.

Raina did know though, that once the spectacle wore off, the enormous house would go back to feeling lonely and echoey. Filling it with people seemed like the only option. Sitting alone in the vastness, with isolation melded into every inch of marble, struck Raina as an easy way to go completely mad.

‘I always thought these massive houses were built like this to keep everyone out, but it’s a bit too cage-like,’ Raina said to her sister.

Solana scoffed. ‘Don’t feel sorry for these people, Rai. We’re here to have a nice night but never forget: agents of capitalism build places like this on the backs of working people’s labour. This is a palace of greed.’

Raina smiled, remembering how fired up and opinionated she herself had been at her sister’s age. ‘All right, Oxford grad.’

‘That’s different – I’m bringing these places down from the inside.’

‘Let them have these houses. It’s eerie. Super lonely.’

‘What’s the charity this year?’

‘Cancer Research,’ Raina said. She’d been the one to arrange all of the administration on that end, and had spoken with the chosen charity. There was going to be an auction at nine o’clock to raise funds in lieu of gifts.

Pepper suddenly burst into the room, moving with such methodical professionalism Raina wondered if she should be wearing a headset of some kind. Or distributing walky-talkies.

‘I looked at the photos you sent,’ Pepper told Raina while she rummaged under the bed. ‘Not twenties enough. Try this instead. You too, Solana.’