Page 62 of With You

“It’s okay,” I reassure him.

I know what he wants to say, a word that’s stronger than what I’ve just confessed, a word that truly encompasses how I feel about him. But it’s too much for either of us right now. So I settle for the feel of him against me instead, his hands in mine, and my lips on his, sealing those words between us without saying them.

Chapter 24

River

The photoshoot is an all-day affair. There are a few different photographers, and the dancers are split into rooms to make the process go faster, but there’s still a lot of stages. First, we have to take solo shots: Amelie in a leotard and tights, while I’m just in shorts, and then in our costumes. Once the individual photos are done, Amelie and I have to take them together, again in our basic outfits as well as our stage ones.

Amelie goes first, wearing a light pink leotard and white tights underneath as she takes her place on the white backdrop. The photographer directs her into various poses, Amelie contorting her body in different ways to achieve the position wanted from her. I alternate between watching Amelie and the photographer’s laptop as each photo appears automatically after it's taken.

She looks stunning, somehow even more beautiful under the harsh lighting, which accentuates every muscle and displays her strength. The way she moves, her arms stretching above her while her legs angle into a split as she leaps, every line of her body elegant and poised—she’s a masterpiece.

I grab my phone from the side, because although we’ll get copies of these photos once they’ve been edited, I want my own. I cycle between taking videos and photos, enjoying the way her laughter between takes quickly shifts to professionalism as soon as the photographer starts counting down. I can already imagine myself rewatching these videos over and over again, when I’m old and grey and my body can’t even think about moving like it does now. I can only hope I’ll be watching them alongside her.

Reality hits as soon as my screen lights up with my father calling. I’ve been ignoring him for a few days, hoping that he’ll give up on forcing me to attend these meetings. No matter how many times I’ve explained to him that I can’t make it, he’s still insistent that I do. The call disconnects before ringing again, and though I know it’ll worsen my mood, I answer.

I mouth to Amelie that I’m going outside to take a call, and excuse myself from the room as the photographer and Amelie continue. I close the door behind me and step into the hallway as I answer the call.

“I’ve scheduled the plane to be at the airfield in two weeks,” he says, without any greeting. “Please make sure you’re on time, these things are horribly overpriced when you’re off schedule.”

“I’ve told you I can’t go to Madrid.” I run my fingers through my hair, pulling at the strands in exasperation. “Can’t you just video call me in? I don’t even contribute anything to these meetings.”

Nine times out of ten, all I do is sit next to my father, nodding or shaking my head at the right times, while saying absolutely nothing of substance. It’s purely for appearances before I join him properly after graduation, so I can’t understand why missing just one meeting is such a big deal.

“No, River, that’s not how it works,” he states. “The plane will take off at six pm, that’s plenty of time to finish classes and get to the airfield. See you then.”

He hangs up without saying anything else. My body hums with frustration, my fingers tightening around the phone in my hand until my knuckles turn white. It doesn’t make any sense that he’s so insistent when he knows the showcase is soon, and every rehearsal leading up to it is vital.

Even though I know it’s childish, I call my mom, hoping she can talk some sense into him. She answers after just a few seconds.

“Hi, Mom.”

“How are you, my darling?” Her voice is bright, in complete contrast to my frustration.

“I was fine until your husband just ruined my day.”

“I know it’s bad if you’re calling him my husband instead of your father,” she laughs. “What has he done now?”

“He’s insistent that I go to Madrid, but I’ve already told him that I have dress rehearsals that week and can’t miss a single one. Can you talk some sense into him?” I really do feel like a child, complaining to my mom like this, but it’s the only solution I can think of.

“I’ve tried talking sense into him for years now,” she says. “I never liked the idea of him going into all these investments, but he said it was the best way to build a stable future for you.”

A sigh escapes me. I know my parents are just trying to do what they think is best for me, trying to provide me with the best possible life they can. I just wish they’d listen to what I want from my life, too.

“Are you sure you can’t just miss one rehearsal?” she asks, and I know I’ve lost the battle already.

“I can’t do that to Amelie,” I tell her. “This showcase is so important to her.”

“I’m glad your heart is in the right place for this performance, but you need to think about your future, too, River. I adored meeting Amelie, and I’m sure she’ll be fine with you missing one rehearsal.”

“Why does she have to be fine with me missing out, instead of him? What difference does it make if I miss a meeting that will happen god knows how many times again?”

“I can’t help you with this, River. Whatever goes on in that company is between you and him,” she sighs.

“I’ll figure it out myself,” I tell her. “Love you, bye.”

I hang up as soon as she says it back. My hands ball into fists at my side as I drop my phone to the ground, my nails digging into my palms as I try to calm myself. I thought Mom would have had more sympathy toward the situation, but it seems she doesn’t realise how important this is to me either.