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Xavier closed his eyes and rested his hands on his knees.

I did what he asked and let it all tumble through me. The cemetery several years ago, legs shaking as I walked over to give him his message. That instant connection snapping into place between us because of it. Watching him with other females when he finally stopped living in the forest and came home. Our fight, the one where I called him names, letting my own hurt feelings control me. The kisses, the way he’d held me to him so tight, making him laugh in the forest. The look on his face when I arrived at his place tonight. The way he’d looked at me when he told me he didn’t want me.

My heart clutched in my chest as if it were happening all over again, and I fought the sob trying to crawl up my throat—

A pressure in my head had me sucking in a startled breath. No, it wasn’t painful, but it was weird. Xavier was in my head, shuffling through my emotions. I breathed through it, through the odd sensations and the pain of my unrequited love for Ren.

I stayed focused on him, replaying that last kiss over and over in my mind, the look on his face, the things he’d said, and until this moment, the emotional pain had only grown more acute with every replay. I let it play out in my head, and again, and again, and each time, it grew less painful. With each run-through, I stopped feeling what I had during those encounters, the emotions becoming muted, and the physicality of it becoming more pronounced.

Until finally—that’s all there was left.

The pressure in my head eased, and I felt Xavier withdraw.

I breathed slow and easy, searching for it, for Ren, for my love for him, but it was—gone. All of it. There was nothing there. I thought about him and felt nothing but sympathy for his predicament. There was still attraction, but no emotional connection.

No pain.

It was gone. I was free.

I wasn’t in love with Ren anymore.

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Chapter 20

Ren

* * *

The feral had moved deeper into the forest. I kicked a pile of bones and searched the area around me. I’d been out here every night for almost a week.

I hadn’t seen Jasmine since I hurt her and she ran from me. She was due to come back to heal me the day after tomorrow. But there was no way she was coming back, not now. Not after what I did.

I headed back the way I came. I’d been avoiding any place I thought Jaz might be, and it was fucking killing me. She was my mate. I knew that now with every part of me. She was mine, and I fucking craved her—her voice, her warmth, her touch, her mouth. Now that I’d had those things, being deprived of them was a new kind of torture.

I couldn’t be the male she deserved, though. It didn’t matter how much I wanted her, I was no good for her, no good for anyone. But I could do this. I could help find these souls and make sure Zinnia came home. For Jasmine.

It took another thirty minutes, but I finally reached Agatheena’s cottage. Smoke drifted from the chimney, the door firmly closed. I couldn’t walk up and knock, so I did the only thing I could, I called her name. I was no doubt attracting every demon in the forest, but I didn’t care, this was fucking important.

Several minutes later, the door finally opened and Agatheena walked out. “You trying to get killed, fox?” she said as she started down the steps.

“I need to talk to you.”

She rolled her eyes as she slowly made her way toward me. “Figured that much out for myself.”

A demon burst from the trees behind me and I spun, flinging my blade and burying it in the demon’s neck. I stalked over, hacked off his head, dusted the ashes from my hands, and walked back.

Agatheena watched me with that shrewd gaze. “You kill the feral yet?”

“You know I haven’t.” The witch knew every damn thing.

“Then not sure why you’re hanging around my front gate caterwauling,” she said, looking at me like she was sizing me up for her pot.

“I give you my word, I will kill it. I’ll kill anything you want me to, just give me the information Jasmine needs now.”

“Manners are free and yet you seem to have forgotten how to use yours,” she said.

I ground my teeth. “Please.”