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“Oh, well, I’ll just get it tomorrow when I come by for your healing session.” I glanced back at the dance floor when the next song started. I loved this song.
“So you’re still coming over tomorrow, then? I wasn’t sure after…what happened.”
He studied me, and I gave him a measured smile. “I’ll be there. I haven’t been at home crying over a broken heart, I promise.” Not anymore. If my heart was broken, I had no knowledge of it, not anymore, and that’s the way I liked it.
“I hurt you,” he said. “And I feel fucking shitty about it, about how I handled everything.”
“Don’t worry about it. I’m completely over it.”
“I don’t believe you,” he said, looking even more pissed.
I frowned. Now I was getting pissed off. “Well, believe it.”
“The way you’re acting…the way you’re looking at me like I don’t exist…” he said, stepping closer. “The way you’re throwing yourself at Talon, taking your top off in front of all these males? Are you trying to make me jealous? Is that what this is?”
I stared at him in disbelief. “You didn’t want me, Ren, and that’s fine because I can tell you with one hundred percent honesty…” I held his gaze. “I don’t want you, either, not anymore.” He flinched, and I felt bad, but I ignored it and carried on. “I care about you. You’re Willow’s familiar, you’re a friend, but I promise you, that’s all you are to me. You definitely haven’t influenced my actions tonight. I just want to enjoy myself.”
He looked, goddess, lost. I gentled my voice. “I want to help you, Ren, more than you know, but you need to get a handle on your emotions. I know it’s confusing, the type of healing we’re doing. It can make you think or feel conflicting things. You wouldn’t be the first client I’ve treated that started to feel, I don’t know, possessive over me or whatever. Or imagine some kind of deeper connection. The fact we’ve known each other a long time, only makes it more confusing.”
“That’s not what’s happening here,” he said.
“If you say so.” Of course that’s what was happening here. He was behaving like some protective older brother. “How much have you had to drink?”
He planted his hands on his hips. “Nothing. I’m not drunk, Jasmine.”
“I’m sorry if you’re struggling at the moment. Maybe you should be with Willow right now?”
His brows shot up. “What? I’m fine.”
I smiled. “Okay, well, that’s really good. I’m going to head back. You have a good night. I’ll see you tomorrow,” I said and walked away.
He was acting this way for the same reason he’d kissed me during our sessions: he was going through a massive emotional upheaval. He would get past it. With more healing, he’d get well again.
He just needed time.
OceanofPDF.com
Chapter 21
Ren
* * *
I opened the door and Jaz stood there, her bag over her shoulder and a barely there smile curving her lips. Her hair was down and tousled in a way I wanted to sink my fingers into, and she was wearing makeup, more than she usually did, her gorgeous green eyes surrounded by charcoal and her full lips deep red. “Hey, Ren,” she said and walked in.
“Hey.” I studied her, still surprised she actually showed up, but she seemed…fine. More than fine. And when she turned to me, her gaze was warm but nothing more. There was no anger or sadness. She looked at me like I could be any one of her clients. Something unpleasant curled its fingers in my gut. Something was seriously off. “Are you okay?”
Her features rearranged into surprise. “Of course.” She waved me forward. “Because your sigils are done and we’re only working on your emotional healing today, we won’t need any warding. Let me just quickly change out the crystals, it’ll keep the souls calm, then we can get started.”
“Sounds good.” I watched as she rushed around, picking up the crystals she left last time and packing them in her bag. I couldn’t take my fucking eyes off her. She took out a small pouch with new ones and walked around laying them out while spelling, muttering the words under her breath.
When she was done, she walked over to me and tilted her head back. “You ready to get started?”
“Yeah, sure.” Was I ready for her to wrap her arms around me? No, I fucking wasn’t. I’d craved it, wanted her hands on me all week, and now that I knew Jasmine was supposed to be mine, I wasn’t sure I could do this and let her go again afterward. How could I do this and not kiss her? I hadn’t been able to resist the other times, but I had to. The reasons we couldn’t be together hadn’t changed.
“Cool. Let’s do this, then I’ll be out of your way,” she said.
I didn’t want her out of my way. I couldn’t have her, but I needed her close. I needed her. Jesus, this was hard, confusing. What did I do with these conflicting emotions? “You don’t need to rush off,” I said. I wasn’t trying to give her mixed signals, but I was feeling fucking desperate.
