Page 93 of The Summer That Changed Us

In her head, she’d imagined a one-night stand. Although even that had been a stretch; the two of them had rarely spent the night apart. But a proper relationship, a family even – it was inconceivable. Had Myles been living a double life? Had he been secretly plotting to leave her? He had been her world. Now she felt as if she was mourning a marriage that hadn’t even been real. She missed him so much, but her love for him was confused and tainted. Life kept dealing her blow after blow; she wasn’t sure she could take much more of this. Right now, she wanted to pack a bag, jump in the car and keep driving, and forget about Myles and Austin and Olivia and any other as yet undiscovered offspring.

‘Grace?’ Roger prompted after a lengthy silence.

‘Yes, sorry. Thank you, Roger.’ Grace was suddenly desperate to terminate this conversation. ‘I appreciate you getting in touch. Enjoy your holiday, I’ll give this some thought while you’re away. Goodbye.’

She ended the call and dropped her head into her hands. ‘My husband made provision for other children in his will. I feel as if I’m going to wake up in a minute and find out all this was a dream.’

Zoe rubbed her sister’s back. ‘Oh Grace, I’m so sorry you’re going through this.’

‘When he died, I was in shock. It didn’t seem real. Then reality hit and I realised I wasn’t going to see him again. Some days I wished I was dead, too, so that I could escape from the grief.’ She looked up at Zoe. ‘Then I started to have better days when I felt like my old self. Now I don’t know what to feel or think.’

Tears ran in tracks down Zoe’s face. ‘I can’t bear this. I hate to see you angry and confused and hurt. Myles loved you with all his heart. He despised himself for what happened.’

Grace’s breath caught in her throat and she stared at her sister. ‘What did you say? What do you mean?’

Fear and guilt flashed across Zoe’s face, but she said nothing.

‘Oh my god. You knew, didn’t you?’ Grace said with sudden realisation. ‘You knew he’d had an affair and you didn’t say.’

Zoe tucked her hands into her lap and nodded miserably, not meeting Grace’s eye.

‘And was there a baby? Come on,’ Grace grabbed her by the shoulders, ‘Zoe, tell me, I need to know.’

‘Yes.’ Zoe’s voice was almost inaudible. ‘I’m sorry. There is a baby.’

Grace gasped for air; her lungs felt as if someone had crushed them in a vice. All this time, Zoe had kept this a secret from her. Myles had fathered a child and Zoe didn’t tell her. It was unbearable.

‘I feel terrible.’ Zoe’s pallor had turned from pink to yellow and her lips were trembling. ‘I’m a terrible person, Grace. It’s all my fault and I don’t blame you if you hate me. I hate myself.’

‘What are you talking about?’ Grace frowned. ‘What was your fault?’

Zoe looked at first at Ruby lying like a little starfish in the centre of her mat and then back at Grace.

Grace scanned Zoe’s face, praying that she had got the wrong end of the stick. But Zoe started to sob.

‘Oh no.’ Grace pressed a hand to her mouth as bile rose in her throat. ‘Are you saying what I think you’re saying?’

‘I’m so, so sorry,’ Zoe wailed. ‘It was never meant to happen, it just … ’

Whatever she said next, Grace didn’t catch. She sprang to her feet and flew to the bathroom and threw up. When she’d finished, she reached for a towel and wiped her mouth. She felt drained of every ounce of energy.

After Myles died so suddenly, her pain was all-consuming. At the time she’d been sure that it would be impossible to hurt any more than she did. She’d been wrong. Today was infinitely worse; today felt as if glass shards were being pressed into her heart. She’d been betrayed by the two people she trusted most in the world.

She forced herself back to the sofa in the living room. Zoe was hunched over, making herself as small as possible. Grace’s body flooded with adrenaline and anger; her fingers curled in tight fists.

‘Look at me,’ she demanded, staring coldly at her sister. Zoe looked up from under her lashes. ‘That story you told me about the sperm bank?’

‘I lied,’ said Zoe.

Grace’s heart was pumping as she twisted in her seat and folded her arms. ‘I think it’s time you told me the truth. Don’t you?’

Chapter Thirty-Two

‘I need to hear you say it,’ said Grace in a low voice. ‘Who is Ruby’s father?’

‘Grace, I—’

‘Just say it.’