Page 9 of A Merry Little Christmas

If the issue was on her side, she’d do anything the doctor suggested, she vowed: give up alcohol forever, do yoga every morning, cut out caffeine. Anything. She crossed her legs and pressed them together to stop them jiggling with nerves. She wouldn’t get despondent, this was just the beginning. There’d probably be a magic fertility pill she could take to solve all the problems. Or IVF, if Olek agreed. She had money in the bank from the sale of her market stall last year; she’d gladly use all of it. She’d wanted to pay off a chunk of the mortgage with it at the time, but Olek had said she should keep it in case it didn’t work out at Merry and Bright and she decided to set up another business. She’d loved him for the suggestion, but, in truth, she had no interest in that. Her focus on becoming a mother was pin-sharp at the moment, eclipsing any career aspirations. She didn’t feel guilty about that; female empowerment should be about having the choice to do what felt right for you and not being obliged to fit a mould defined by someone else.

As she sipped her coffee, her phone pinged with a message. It would be Merry, she knew without even looking. There was a woman whose work/life balance needed a bit of tinkering with. What Merry could use was some rest, at least while she was in hospital. But, instead, her brain was working overtime. Nell read over her best friend’s latest thought.

I thought we could have a little January sale after Christmas, what do you think? We could clear all the stock with festive names and make room for all the new-year stuff. If we’ve got any gift wrap left, we can sell that off at bargain prices too.

Nell had to admit, that was a good idea and sent her a reply.

Good thinking! Tell you what, I’ll bring in a notebook and pen later and you can make a list of the things you think of, rather than text me with each idea.

Lol!! Am I getting on your nerves?

Nooooooo – only slightly;)

Sorry, I’m just itching to get out of here!

Merry was like a bottle of pop today. Nell understood; her friend was feeling like the birth of the baby was a ticking time bomb: one false move on her part and … boom, she’d go into labour. She sighed wistfully; if it was her, she’d want the baby to arrive as soon as possible so she could meet her child, hold her own baby in her arms and feel her heart melt with love. She was fairly sure that work would be the last thing on her mind.

It was hard not to feel envious of Merry, especially watching her stomach swell over the last few months, from the tiny bump you’d only notice if you were looking for it, to the almost comic spherical belly she had now. And it wasn’t just her shape that had changed. While Nell had become more anxious and had lost weight along with her sparkle, Merry had bloomed and looked ever more adorable. It didn’t seem fair. She flicked away her uncharitable thoughts; if anyone deserved a happy ending, it was Merry, and despite her own situation, Nell was thrilled that everything seemed to be finally falling into place for her best friend.

She finished her coffee and picked up her phone. Olek should be here by now. Their appointment was only ten minutes away, and they were always seen promptly.

She opened their WhatsApp chat and typed him a message.

Are you far away?

Sorry, darling. Still stuck at my last job. I was just about to message you. I don’t think I’m going to make it. I’m gutted.

She groaned inwardly: not today of all days.

Please, darling, this is important.

Olek ran a successful business as a locksmith. Sometimes, a little too successful. He was in demand and worked long hours, many of which were at inconvenient times.

I know it is. Hold on, I’ll go outside and call you.

She decided to do the same, and by the time she stepped out of the surgery, Olek had rung.

‘I’m sorry, Nell. It has been crazy here,’ he said. ‘The customer is a woman with two small children. The ex-boyfriend smashed the lock on the door with a hammer because she wouldn’t let him see the kids. By the time the police arrived, he’d put the hammer through all the downstairs windows.’

‘Oh my word. Poor woman.’

‘I know. I couldn’t leave her, not until she feels safe.’

‘Of course not, I understand, you did the right thing.’

He let out a breath of relief. ‘Thank you for understanding. What sort of man would put his own children through that sort of trauma? How can he ever hope to have any sort of relationship with them after behaving that way? It is very sad, Nell. I am doing my best to show that not all men are animals.’

Nell felt a wave of tenderness for her big-hearted man. ‘No one could ever mistake you for an animal, unless it was a big cuddly teddy bear.’

He laughed softly. ‘Only where you are concerned. I can be tough if I have to.’

‘I know.’ Olek had had to be tough over the years. At fifteen years old, when he and his family had moved to the UK from Poland, he was thrust into a secondary school with only the barest grasp of the language. And later, when Yvonna, his wife of two years, announced that she didn’t love him anymore and asked him to move out, Olek had behaved with dignity and done as his wife had asked. It had only been a matter of weeks before he’d discovered that his place in the marital bed had been taken over by his best friend, Viktor, with whom Yvonna had been conducting an affair for some time. Olek had been devastated by her betrayal but had made sure Max knew his father would always be there for him and that his parents’ love for him hadn’t changed even though their love for each other had.

Nell realised that Olek was still telling her about the job he was on and tuned in again.

‘Her sister is here looking after them all, but the customer asked me to put new security bolts on the back door too. So I did that and now she’s begging me not to leave until the glazers have been to mend the windows so that the house is secure again. I know it’s not ideal, but could we rearrange today’s appointment?’

‘I don’t want to rearrange.’ Nell felt a flutter of panic. This appointment had been indelibly engraved in her brain for weeks. ‘I didn’t sleep last night, mulling over it all, working through the possible permutations and trying to decide what Plan B should be if the investigations uncover a problem. I need to know, Olek, it’s eating me up.’