Page 137 of Breakaway Hearts

I shake my head at how naïve his privilege allows him to be.

Owen holds me until the tears stop falling.

“And Freddy?” he asks gently.

“Was in the room. He looked horrified when he saw what was happening. I latched on to that in the beginning, pleading with any of the guys I knew not to do this…When Freddy walked out, I locked eyes with him, praying he’d take me with him or go get help, but he was just running away. He denied everything when Jason asked.”

The end of my senior year was not great. I was blamed for Jason quitting, and the rumor was that I was upset Trevor wouldn’t call me his girlfriend, so I made up lies. I was said to be delusional, because everyone knew someone like him would never date a scholarship girl whose mom works in the cafeteria.

Chapter Sixty

Owen

Might be two of us

Fuck.

All I want to do is go back to that hotel and beat Freddy what’s his face to a pulp, then track down the fucking rapist who did that to Madison and murder him with my bare hands. I’m not a violent person, but…Fuck.

I’m reeling, and the only thing keeping me from doing those very violent things is Madison, sleeping in my arms, counting on me to keep her safe. Or probably the deadbolt on her door I now understand her not letting me through the first few times I came here, but fuck, what is wrong with people? How can someone look at Maddie and…the fucker even had her, yet he still treated her like I wouldn’t want someone I hate to be treated.

And the way she just looked at me now, when I told her I’d never… I wanted her to understand she would always be safe with me, but it was like she believes me but doesn’t trust it. Like even if she doesn’t think I’m lying, she still expects me to hurt her.

I don’t think I’ve ever been this angry before. I mean, I get mad about and hate every asshole who sends someone they say they love to the shelter, but I guess it’s never been someone I…someone I love. Which I didn’t realize until tonight, but now that I have, it’s been going on for a while. How could I not? Would she even believe me if I told her? Fuck.

I am not equipped for this. I’m fun, I’m a good time, I’m well-versed in considerate boyfriend gestures, but I don’t know how to deal with these kinds of issues. I’m the guy you call in to distract Jules, I have no idea how to help…anyone.

Madison rolls onto her side, away from me, so I quietly slip out of her bed to get some water so my jitters don’t wake her.

Jason is sitting at the island with a glass of milk in front of him, facing Madison’s door like it’s taking all he has not to go in and make sure she’s okay. I get the impression he’s spent many nights out here like this.

I don’t sit, because all my restraint was used to be there for Mads and now all I see is red.

“How the fuck aren’t you in jail right now?”

I can see the moment he gets that she told me. His eyes go wide with shock. Then guilt.

“I’m not judging you; I am truly asking how you do it because the only thing stopping me from looking up everyone who played for your high school team and ripping them apart with my bare hands is the thought that I can’t protect her from behind bars if I missed one.”

I see that same desperation on his face, the helplessness, before he shrugs.

“It wasn’t what she needed,” he says simply, which is not an answer, and not at all helpful.

“She’s still fucking terrified of them. It’s not even that she doesn’t trust guys anymore. It’s that she doesn’t trust herself to know who’s a predator, and that kills me.”

He considers this.

“When it happened, I wanted to kill them, but Maddie was definitely not okay, and it was more important for me to get her safe than to punish them. I was naive enough to think they would all rot in jail, and I didn’t want me assaulting them to give them any leniency. When it became clear no one was going to pay for what they did –except for Maddie…” He sighs. “She didn’t need me to cause fights and stir shit up, she needed me to be the one guy in the universe she trusted.”

I’m so fucking grateful she has him, but I’m not sure if I want to tell him that or pin him to the wall until he gives me names.

“If she told you, it means there might be two of us,” he adds, ripping my fucking heart open.

“It took everything in me to walk away from Freddy, and that was before I knew what he did. I want to kill this Trevor punk.”

“Don’t. What she needs right now isn’t for you to treat her like she’s broken, or breakable. I’m guessing she told you so you understand, because she’s letting you in, which I think is awesome and something she really needs, but being my captain and being in love with her won’t stop me from kicking your ass if you hurt her, especially with this.”

“I would never,” I promise, not denying that I love her.