Page 107 of Crack the Ice

“You’d be okay with that?”

He snorts, letting his head fall back against the headrest. “It’s the perfect night in my book, Cecy.”

True to his word, we did indeed have pizza and movie night, and it was the perfect way to end a chaotic day. There was no thinking involved, no decisions to be made. In fact, when I asked him what kind of pizza they wanted, he told me he’d already taken care of it.

That didn’t mean we got out of the day unscathed. I got a call from his principal, letting me know that the incident had been reported by another student, and though Cade was portrayed as the one standing up for the other kid, it had been reported to Sheila.

Because once wasn’t enough today, apparently.

Which means I’m sure Mav knows, and Tom is going to have some sort of paperwork to handle, not to mention this is the first time I’ve been alone with them and bam. This happens.

They’ve both cleaned up and gotten ready for bed, and for the first time since Sunny called at eleven this morning, I look at my phone, swallowing roughly as I see the number of texts and missed calls from Mav I have—ahh shit.

Mav

I miss you.

How are you?

Baby?

Okay, I see you and the kids are home, but are you okay?

8 missed calls from Mav.

I’m about to hop on a plane back home if you don’t answer me.

I quickly hit his contact, calling his phone, which he only lets ring for half a second before his rough, breathless voice comes over the phone.

“Cecilia, what the actual fuck?” I cringe at the worry in his tone.

A whine sneaks up my throat, bleeding into the room without permission. Damn it, I’m not cut out for this.

He takes a giant inhale, letting it out in one quick hiss. “Are you okay?”

“I–I…” I can’t form words. My brain is still stuck in overwhelm.

“Breathe, baby. I’m sorry, I was just worried.”

I take a deep breath through my nose, holding it for a second before letting it out. “You would have come home to make sure I was okay if I didn’t answer?”

“Yes, no questions asked.”

I don’t have the strength to hold it in anymore. My head is a mess, my brain’s telling me I’ve done nothing but fail and let everyone down today. My heart is begging me to tell him to get on a plane and come home to me, but his team needs him, too. A choked sob breaks free seconds before I throw myself face-first into a pillow so I don’t worry the kids if they happen to come back this way.

I’m curled up in Mav’s sweatshirt in the middle of his bed, with my oversized fuzzy blanket, which he hates because it makes him too hot. I hear him talking, whispering gently in my ear, but I can’t tell you what he’s saying as I run my toes back and forth across the sheets, trying to ground myself to the moment.

I don’t know how long I live inside my implosion, but soon parts of my body start to power down one by one. My brain has gone offline, eyes trained on the wall in front of me as the emotional hangover sets in. I don’t know if Mav’s still on the phone or not. I don’t even know where my phone is at the moment, lost in the sheets somewhere. My body is tired. Hell, my nervous system has run a marathon and a half today. Eventually, I lose, or surrender—I’m not sure which at this point, but my eyes become too heavy to keep open. And once again, it feels like my body gives up on me when it drifts off into the most uncomfortable sleep I’ve had in a long time.

“Cecy,” my name floats through my skull.

I search for the source in the dark, but I can’t see anything. It’s too dark, and my body is too heavy to move.

“Cecilia,” it says again. I know that voice, but he isn’t here. “Baby,” it says louder this time.

Shit, my phone. My eyes fly open as I shoot off the bed, narrowly missing smacking my head against his.

“M-Mav?” I say, hand reaching out to touch his face. This isn’t real. He isn’t here, is he?