Page 31 of True Blue

Sometimes the men would start talking over the women, completely cutting off what they were saying and not thinking anything of it. I think the most concerning thing was that Teddy’s cousins were two boys close to eighteen who displayed the same behavior when their mothers spoke.

I caught Stephanie’s eye a couple of times, and she pantomimed slicing her neck open with her butter knife, which made me snort quietly.

But every time I would meet Teddy’s eyes, he would just smile and ask if I was okay.

When dinner was done, the men immediately got up and walked into the den to watch Football, while the women grabbed the dishes and went into the kitchen to clean.

“You’re my guest, Indie,” Ellie said, grabbing my arm and bringing me into a small sitting room. “We got cards to play.”

My eyes couldn’t help but drift over her shoulder, to the kitchen, where the women were talking, and how my stomach twisted as I played cards with Ellie when I heard the men cheering at the television screen.

Some family dynamics are different; there’s clearly a more traditional dynamic here. It wasn’t something I agreed with, but I couldn’t dictate how someone else ran their household.

But as I heard Teddy laughing with his father, uncles, and cousins in the den, I couldn’t help but feel a twinge of disappointment.

It won’t be ours.

“Your family is nice,” I tell Teddy now, because that’s at least the truth.

Teddy looks relieved, and I can’t help but feel a little guilty. The thing is, I don’t even know what to tell him.

Your mother seems to favor you over your sisters in a way that’s concerning. He already told me he’s the baby and her only son.

The male members of your family are showing signs of sexism and an expectation of gender roles that I do not like. It wasn’t my family, so I didn’t really get a say in how they run things.

Your mother was nice to me in a way that makes me concerned that if I turn my back, I’ll find a knife in it. How could I even prove that? Ellie, maybe, or his sisters, but again, I’m an outsider commenting on one dinner, one night, one peek into the Williams family dynamics.

“My sisters really like you,” Teddy sighs, pulling me into his arms and pressing a kiss to my cheek. “They told me to hold onto you.”

I smile, and for a moment, happiness cuts through my uncertainty. Knowing I have at least three allies in his sisters and Nana helps steady me. I lean my cheek on his chest, letting his presence ground me, swaying gently as my nerves begin to settle.

“Everything went wrong today,” I murmur, letting out a shaky breath as my nerves unwind, especially being back in the safety of home.

I glance around my apartment. It’s small, but it’s been my home for the last three years, and it’s really all the space I’ve ever needed. A queen-sized bed, television on a thrift store trunk I found years ago, that now holds my old college books and notes I’m keeping—just in case.

In fact, pretty much every piece of furniture in my apartment is secondhand—besides my mattress. My old professor advised that, since we work on our feet, we should invest in a good mattress and comfortable shoes.

It’s peaceful and quiet when I get home, since the bakery downstairs closes early. Every morning, I wake to the scent of pastries.

Most importantly, the rent is cheap. The building's owner, an older woman with too much money, hasn’t realized how much rent has risen. I’m pretty sure she’s measuring prices by the 1994 market—not that I’d dream of complaining.

“I was so nervous,” I admit.

“You were wonderful,” Teddy assures me, brushing a hand down my head.

“Really?” I ask, skeptical. “Because I kind of think your mom… doesn’t like me?”

Teddy looks shocked.

“What? No, honey, my mom likes you—she told me so.”

My brows shoot up at that.

“Really,” it’s not a question, it’s a challenge.

“Yeah,” Teddy nods, grinning proudly. “She said I brought a nice girl home.”

Okay. Maybe I misread things? But maybe she’s just using the adjective nice in the same way that I am. I huff, feeling dizzy with these back-and-forth thoughts.