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Thirty

Two weeks later

“Holy shit, she LIVES!” Lucy huffed.

Alex cringed and pulled her phone away from her ear. She tightened her scarf against the grey March morning and speed-walked down her dad’s street. She’d known this was coming.

“So you call to say you’ve arrived, said you might be offline for a bit, and then…you ghost me—for three weeks? Thanks a bunch!”

“Come on, Lucy. You know I wasn’t ghosting you. I was trying to settle in here without… I needed to focus and not think about—”

“I haven’t even seen he-who-shall-not-be-named. Don’t punish me and Harry. We’re on your side, remember?”

“I’m not punishing anyone. I’m busy with my therapy sessions and writing. My phone kept buzzing, and I stuck it in a drawer so I could concentrate. I got used to being without it.”

“I just wish you had told me! My mind was all over the bloody shop. Were you pissed at me? Were you ill? I was freaking, so I put Harry on standby…” Her words drifted away from the speaker. “Didn’t I, Haribo?”

“I just do what I’m told. Hi, Lex!”

Alex’s laughed at Harry’s—a.k.a. Haribo’s—barely audible response in the background. She pictured him sat in his robe, thumbing through the paper, sugary tea at the ready, but wait…it was Monday morning. Why was Harry home with Lucy at twenty past nine?

“Why’s he on standby?”

“To drive me to your dad’s. I made him take the day off, that’s how much I was bricking it, Lex.”

“Crap. Sorry. I’m just working through things. Didn’t Dad tell you—”

“Yeah, when I finally reached him, but I didn’t know if he was telling the truth. I can’t read parents.”

“Well, you can trust him—he’s a terrible liar, even on the phone.” Alex waited for a car to pass before crossing the street. “So, what’s new with you guys? How’s work? How’s the drawing coming along?”

“Nice try, Lex—you’re not ducking and diving around my questions. How’s life in the sleepy suburbs? Have you had a chance to visit Manchester city centre?”

“Just once, two weeks ago. Like I said, it’s been therapy and writing—nothing thrilling.”

“Want your new passwords, then?”

“Not yet. It’s too tempting. I deleted the apps off my phone and everything. I’m determined to stick with this break. I’m only dipping in for work emails.”

“God, I’d shrivel up and die—and be jobless—without social media. How’s the withdrawal? Sweats, shakes, dizziness?”

The sky began to darken, so Alex upped her pace. “All of the above. I even had the beginnings of a panic attack after the first few days. Despite that, going cold turkey has been good for me.”

“Ah, Lex. I’m so shit! I didn’t mean to make light of your attacks.”

“You didn’t,” she answered breathlessly. “Hey, if we can’t joke about it—”

“Wait, you’re not having—”

“No, I’m not having one now. I’m rushing to meet Joan.”

“Thank fuck. I thought I—never mind.”

“Joan’s worse than a drill sergeant. Here’s my typical day: Zumba together first thing, then her two-hour computer class, either pottery studio in the afternoon or a therapy sesh, and then a couple of hours writing.”

“Why are you in her computer class?”

“I’m not in her class. I just go along and write while she teaches.”