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“Sleep well?” she whispered back.

“Uh-huh.” The curve of a grin stretched his lips as his eyes peeled open, his initial bliss suddenly scuttled with a gaze-widening, body-stiffening “Fuck! Sorry!” He fisted the sleeping bag. “I-I must’ve turned over during the—” Halting, he lifted the covering and peeked downward, his frozen expression melting into a mortified wince. “Oh shit! I’m beyond sorry.”

I’m not. Waking up with Nick’s erection drilling into her back? The most action Evie had felt in years.

Hugging the sleeping bag against his bare chest, he scrambled as far back as its constraints would allow. “Wasn’t on purpose!”

“I know.”

“I fell asleep facing the wall.”

“I know.” She smiled softly, but Nick still looked horrified.

“I would never intentionally—” His hunched shoulders collapsed with remorse. “Forgive me.”

Evie felt a blush rising and glanced away. “It was kinda nice. I haven’t had a boner wakeup call in ages, let alone…” She shrugged and found him again, his gaze growing heavy, settling on her lips.

Oh?! Her heart tripped.

Nick swept her bangs slowly away from her lashes like he was seeing her for the first time. Either that or he thought she was long overdue for a trim.

There was only one way to find out.

With his fingers still in her hair, Evie pitched forward, meeting his mouth with a determined kiss, fully expecting him to pull back.

Which he did.

A flash of desire lit up his eyes. “Wow, Evie.” Licking his lips, the glimmer vanished, displaced by narrowing uncertainty. “I’m more than willing, but are you sure about this?”

Am I? The spark of doubt flamed again. What if this is a mistake? What if I’m opening myself up to more hurt? For thirteen years, she had tormented herself, replaying their sizzling kisses and hurried fumbles, how Nick had pledged his love “for always” and spoken of a shared future together. She had believed him, trusted him, allowed herself to be vulnerable only to have his actions shatter her completely, heart and soul.

Clutching to past wrongs and avoiding Nick had become a deep-rooted habit, but was she happier because of it? More fulfilled?

A mournful ache throbbed in her chest.

Not even close. It’s preventing me from living fully now. I can’t keep dragging old baggage into new situations. The thought of climbing back into her self-imposed cage of what-ifs and might’ve-beens pinched in the worst way, and Evie was sick of it, sick of blaming her disastrous love life on Crohn’s, sick of holding herself back with unproven assumptions and cruel labels—labels she wore by choice.

Like calling myself a burden.

The epiphany hit her hard.

I’m not a burden. I’m strong and resilient. A survivor.

A sense of hope and empowerment bloomed in Evie’s chest.

And it’s up to me—not Nick or anyone else—to set myself free.

Sometimes the greatest act of kindness is the kindness you grant yourself.

Evie nodded. “Couldn’t be more sure.” She kissed him hungrily and he responded in kind, his hands cradling her face, holding her still, making her his.

Pausing momentarily, he smiled against her mouth, his tenderness feeling like home. “I’ve missed you, Tigs.”

Tigs. Parting her lips, she welcomed him in, his tongue deliciously flirty as she tasted him, going deeper, harder. A familiar groan escaped his throat, and paired with the mention of her old nickname, it was all the encouragement Evie needed. She trapped his thigh with hers, tugging him closer as her fingers trespassed in his hair, thick and soft—god how she’d missed it. Making the most of the moment, she grasped fistfuls, reviving cherished teenage memories of snogging on the beach, in her mum’s car, in Nick’s bedroom.

He must’ve been feeling the pull of nostalgia, too. Breaking their kiss, he took his fingers on a detour, tracing the constellation of freckles on her shoulder as the hard heat stretching his boxer briefs prodded her stomach. “I want you,” he whispered. “More than anything.”

Evie opened the front clasp on her bra and he closed his mouth around her peaked nipple. With a hard suck, a rush of pleasure tingled between her thighs. She bucked, bewitched by his wicked tongue as she dug her nails into his shoulders and arched her back, pressing harder, wanting more while her other hand explored Nick’s body.