Page 57
“I know you are upset, I know you don’t want this, but you need to calm down. My temper is paper-thin, Addie, so pull yourself together and fucking deal with it instead of running from us,” Eli says before opening the door and hopping out.
He walks back inside, leaving me in the car. I can’t believe my mother is letting me go; I’ve always wanted to be on my own, but truly being on my own now scares me. Technically I won’t be on my own, but I am still losing all the responsibility that comes with being in this family, and now that I am being given my freedom, I somehow no longer want it. Funny how that works. You want something so bad that once you get it, you no longer know what to do with it. It is always some goal you are working toward but never truly see happening, yet you continue trying to strive for it.
Maya brings me out of my thoughts when she suddenly climbs into my car. I look at her in the backseat when Cyrus climbs in the passenger seat with her school bag. Have I really been sitting out here long enough that an hour has slipped past without me realizing it? Looking at the clock in my car, it is 6:30AM, the time I usually drop her to before-school care. Looking down, I am still in my pajamas. Cyrus hands me the keys and doesn’t say a word. I start the car, driving her to before-school care.
“Where is Eli?”
“Organizing things for Taylor,” he says, and I nod.
Pulling up at her school, Cyrus gets out before unbuckling Maya. Maya leans over the seat, pecking me on the cheek before climbing out and grabbing Cyrus’s hand. I watch as he takes her through the gates to where she needs to go. The teacher is waiting out the front as she waits for her pupils to arrive. I watch as she takes Maya’s hand, escorting her into the before-school care room. Cyrus waits for her to be out of sight before turning around, walking back to the car, and climbing in.
“Coffee?” he asks, and I look down at my clothes.
“I’ll go in,” he says, and I nod, driving to the café where I usually get my morning coffee.
Cyrus gets out before returning with four coffees. I drive home and see Eli’s car gone from the driveway.
“He will be back any minute with Taylor,” Cyrus says, and I nod.
Walking to the door, I unlock it and find my mother has already left for work. Going inside, I go upstairs to get changed. I am just pulling my shirt off over my head when Cyrus walks in. I quickly pull my shirt back down.
Cyrus’s hands move to my hip before he rests his chin on my shoulder. Tingles are moving across my skin, making me shiver against him, which doesn’t go unnoticed by him. Cyrus moves his hands underneath my shirt, his hands moving over my stomach, sending sparks everywhere.
“Do the tingles ever stop?” I ask.
“Nope. Why do they bother you?”
I shake my head. “No, just a strange feeling,” I tell him, and he nods, running his nose across my jaw before kissing my cheek.
“I hit Eli,” I tell him.
“I know, I saw,” he says. “You have a thing with hitting him.” He chuckles.
“I shouldn’t have,” I tell him, and he hums softly.
“No, but it wouldn’t have hurt him. You can’t hurt us, Addie, not in that way anyway.”
“How then?”
“You want to hurt us?” he asks, pulling back.
I turn in his arms, facing him. “No, just curious,” I tell him as he looks down at me.
“Everything will be alright, Addie. You have us now,” he says, and I look away.
Do I want them, though?
“I can practically hear the cogs turning in your head. What are you afraid of?”
“I’m not afraid of anything. I just don’t like change.”
“Hmmm…” he hums before falling silent for a few seconds. I watch his brows furrow before he speaks again.
“Do you want us?”
“I don’t know,” I tell him honestly.
Everything has changed in such a short amount of time; my entire life has changed. He goes to say something when I hear the front door open and close. I look at my bedroom door, and Cyrus lets me go.
