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“It’s okay,” she said. “I’ll just be hanging around. You better get back to work,” she winked as she stepped back and made space for the next person in line.
“Hey!” He said before she got too far. “Come to the ugly sweater contest tonight! I’ll need all the support I can get to win that thing.”
“I don’t have an ugly sweater,” Maye frowned.
“What you’re wearing is fine,” he said.
The people in his line groaned at the comment.
“That’s not what I meant you guys, come on!” Chris pleaded.
Maye secured a couple seats for her and Tracy in the auditorium for the ugly sweater contest while Tracy ran to the car to change into her sweater. She made it back just as the emcee started to announce the participants.
“Welcome to one of our favorite con activities, the Ugly Sweater Contest!”
Whistles rang out as the crowd cheered loudly.
“Oh, we got a rowdy crowd tonight!” the emcee said. “Like we do every year, we’ve done our best to conceal each actor’s identity so we can judge solely on the sweater. And the winner will be judged based on applause.”
Maye leaned toward Tracy. “So why are so many people dressed up if the contest is for the actors?”
“Maye, have I taught you nothing?” Tracy shook her head. “It’s fun! Also, spotters search the audience and pick out people with the best sweaters to compete, too.”
“Are we ready for our first contestant?” The emcee asked the crowd. “Alright, contestant number one, come on out!”
The speakers started playing an elevator music version of “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” as the first contestant danced their way to center stage wearing a Santa beard and reindeer glasses.
“What an interesting sweater,” the emcee announced. “They went with garland down each arm and across the chest. I mean, I guess that’s festive, right?”
When they got to center stage, the contestant raised their arms in a circle above their head to form a wreath, and the crowd went ballistic, exuding surprise followed by sheer excitement.
“Whoa!” The emcee shouted. “I did not see that coming! We have a human wreath! Alright, time for our next contestant.”
The emcee referred to the second contestant as the human tree because they wore a green sweater with gold tinsel that zig-zagged across the front and was dotted with ornaments, like a Christmas tree. The audience roared when the human tree clicked a button that lit up lights on their sweater.
Maye knew right away that contestant number three was Chris. The emcee nicknamed him the deer hunter because he wore a sweater with a brick pattern like a fireplace and a stuffed deer head protruding from the chest.
“Sounds like we have some vegans in the crowd,” the emcee said as the cheers softened. “That’s tough, deer hunter.”
The final contestant strutted out in a sweater with a llama wearing a scarf around its neck that hung off the front of the sweater. The crowd came back to life when contestant number four twirled the scarf around and moved their hips in a way that elicited flirty “wheet-WHOOO” whistles and comments to “shake it, baby!”
“Sounds like the vegans are back on board!” the emcee joked. “And now for the best part. Santa’s helpers, work your magic!”
Four volunteers scoured the audience while people jumped up and down to show off their ugliest sweater. The helpers picked four of the most hideous homemade sweaters they could find and invited them on stage.
“Dang,” Tracy said. “I never get picked.”
“It’s because you wear it so well, Tracy. It’s a compliment. Those people look ridiculous.”
The emcee went down the line measuring cheers for each sweater and declared the audience the winner when all four received the loudest applause.
As the crowd cleared out after the event, Maye found Chris hanging around the stage talking to some people. She waited patiently for him to finish his conversation and felt a bit like a teenager again when she finally got to talk to him.
“A stuffed deer, huh?” she said, shaking her head.
“It’s a 12-point buck! Those ignoramuses don’t know how rare this is.”
“You did great up there. It’s fun to watch you at work,” Maye said.
