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“Yeah, maybe for you,” she said. “Did you know the show was edited like that?”
“Like what? I thought it looked great—”
“You took what I said completely out of context.”
“Maye, I don’t know what you’re talking about, but we can figure this out. Okay? We can fix this. Whatever it is.”
“I told you and Jayce that I didn’t want to make a mockery of therapy. You shouldn’t be cutting what I said and putting it in different places. It can hurt someone.”
Chris took a deep breath. “You’re right, you made that clear, and I thought we respected that. We all just watched the same show together, and I didn’t see anything that seemed misleading. I feel like this might be about something else, though. Is it? Is there something else?”
Maye’s paranoia was getting the best of her, and she couldn’t help but wonder if he was putting on for the camera and the audience.
“That woman, Sheila, her boyfriend left her and she said this is all an act, and the show edit and—”
“Listen, Maye, you aren’t responsible for what happened to Sheila. You weren’t even part of that original conversation,” Chris pleaded.
“It doesn’t matter,” Maye wouldn’t hear it. “I don’t want to mislead anyone and certainly don’t want to feel misled. If this show is more important than anything else, I wish you’d just say so.”
“Maye, just come back with me and we’ll figure this out.”
“No, I can’t. I have to go.”
She quickly changed directions and weaved through the vendor booths and walked as fast as she could to her car. When she slammed the door, she finally released the emotions she was holding in. She cried and scolded herself about how she could let this happen. Her phone kept ringing with calls and dinging with texts from Chris and from Tracy. She turned off her phone and started her car. She considered driving back to Greenville, but she couldn’t bear to leave Tracy stranded like that. The only thing she could do was to drive back to her hotel and crawl into bed.
- 39 -
Live Show Day
Maye woke up in the same clothes she wore the day before, an immediate reminder of what had happened. She didn’t want to turn on her phone, didn’t want to do the live show, and didn’t want to face Chris. The least she could do was explain everything to Tracy, so she walked to Tracy’s room and tapped on the door. Maye could hear the muffled sounds of Tracy fumbling around her room.
“Maye?” Tracy said, squinting at the light and in a voice as coarse as sandpaper. “I was worried about you. What the heck! Come in.” She walked back to her bed and crashed face first into it.
“Sorry, I left like that,” Maye said as she sat by Tracy’s feet. “I know I have some explaining to do, but first, what happened to you? You are in full zombie mode.”
“Ugh…” Tracy groaned. “We did the boot shot last night. Or should I say, boot shots. Your turn. What happened? That was weird.”
“I know,” Maye said. “I freaked out. I just…hearing that woman say it was all just a performance, it really got to me. It hurt my feelings. I don’t think I’m cut out for this. Then there was this weird edit in the show that I noticed. It made me feel like I didn’t really know what was going on around me. Like, am I missing something? I’m probably overreacting…”
Tracy mumbled something incoherent into her pillow.
“What?” Maye said.
Tracy lifted her head up as much as she could. “You are definitely overreacting.”
“Really??” Maye blurted out. “But how do you know? I don’t know if I can even trust myself to know anymore.”
Tracy lifted her head off the pillow and turned to look at Maye. Hair was stuck to her face. “I think you should talk to Chris.”
“I know, but I feel ridiculous,” Maye whined.
Tracy crashed back into her pillow. “Well I’m done talking for now, so go find Chris.”
Maye let her mind wander. The tension she felt in her shoulders and chest was released when she thought about the realization she had on-stage with Chris. For a moment, she felt lighter. But then Tracy started snoring and the heaviness returned. The worry that she was missing something. The dread of ignorance. She just had to hold on to a glimmer of hope.
“Tracy?” Maye said quietly. “I need to tell you something. I realized it last night on stage before, well, everything.”
Tracy grunted.