Page 64
We’re sitting across each other, my eyes tracking her movements, almost robotic but slightly better than before.
She’s no longer lost, the green in her eyes slowly emerging, erasing the unwanted darkness, and she is speaking again as I keep on asking questions, provoking her to answer.
Had she managed to lock the bathroom door, what would she have done? I don’t even let the thought settle.
Every possibility my mind drags up makes me clutch the fork a little harder.
Unease coils tightly in my chest, refusing to loosen, like my instincts know something my logic is trying to deny.
“Do you like them?” I ask after chewing.
“Mm-hmm.” Followed by a small nod.
“Too sweet?”
“No, they’re good.”
“Want more maple syrup?” “No, I’m good.”
“How about strawberries?”
“Mm-hmm.” A tiny, barely noticeable shake of her head.
“I cook all right.”
“Yes.”
“Good, I’d hate to be culinarily disappointing.” No response.
“Ro’s dad is hosting a ball on his seventieth birthday. I want you to come with me.”
Silence and then. “No.”
“I wasn’t asking, baby.” I smile and she still shakes her head. “Besides, it could be fun. Who knows you’ll—”
“Sergei.” She cuts me off with a hard expression.
There she is.
“What are you doing here?” Her tone is serious as if done with my bullshit. “This whole charade of affection, what’s the end goal?”
“You think it’s a charade?”
“What else? Am I supposed to buy the whole ‘you love me’ persona you’re wearing?”
“I don’t love you.” I tell her and get up from the chair abruptly.
The response was far too quick for me to care for the hurt it must’ve caused her.
But I am right. I don’t fucking love her.
“Right.” She nods and wipes her mouth with the napkin, placing it back on the table with practised precision and gets up. “So, go away. Leave me be. You’re not interested, neither am I.”
She pats my shoulder, removing imaginary creases on my shirt.
“We don’t want big Russian mafia’s spawn to waste his precious time, do we?”
“That’s not for you to decide.” I chuckle, my hands clenching and unclenching with untamed rage.
