Page 40

And I feel bad. Again.

I’m such a jerk.

History can make me cautious, but I don’t want it to make me mean.

Do better, Hattie.

My shoulders sag. How many times am I going to have to say, “Sorry, I⁠—”

“It’s fine.” He waves it off. “I deserve it.”

“You do, but that doesn’t make it right.” I stand there for a few seconds, then walk away because my head is scrambled, and I need a little space. “So. Let’s. Just . . .”

Noble follows beside me, quiet, and then he says, “Wait, is this⁠—”

“The sunken forest,” I say. “Yeah.”

“This was your favorite place on the ranch.”

I nod. “I can’t believe you remember that.”

“I remember the day you showed it to me,” he says, smiling through the memory. “It felt like you were telling me a secret.”

I really only had one secret I wanted to tell Noble, and I’ll carry it to my grave.

I thought I loved you.

“First time I found it, I couldn’t believe none of the boys knew about it,” I say now, thinking back. “So I made it my spot. With that many obnoxious people under one roof, it was hard to find any peace and quiet.”

He watches me like he actually cares what I have to say. It makes me feel wobbly, but I keep going. I can do this. I can be nice to Noble without falling for him again.

Right?

“Out here, though—” I blow out a breath. “It’s nothing but nature. Something about it just settles me, you know? There’s something sort of . . . spiritual about it. It feels outside everything else. Separate. Clean. Unbothered.” I breathe in and out and try to take it all in, then a wave of embarrassment washes over me. “I’m sure that sounds cheesy to you.”

I’m not sure why I’m saying any of this. When it comes to Noble, my feelings are hot and cold and near and far and easy and difficult all at the same time.

“No, I get it,” he says. “I wish I had somewhere like this to go.” He looks away. “It’s noisy where I am.” I can almost feel the weight he’s dragging around behind him. Why, though? He’s famous, at least in some circles. Rich too, probably. Thousands of fans and hundreds of women.

That thought makes me grit my teeth.

Is it wrong to want to be the person he can confide in again? I’m not sure my heart can handle it if he does.

We both go still, surrounded by nothing but the sound of a gentle breeze rustling the trees. “Is it still your favorite spot on the ranch?” he asks. “Because the dock down by the lake is pretty awesome too.”

A soft laugh escapes. “Yeah, it is pretty awesome. But there’s still something about this place.”

He nods, and when he closes his eyes, I study his face, noting the thin lines of worry etched in the skin of his forehead. I fight the urge to reach up and rub them away. With his eyes closed, I feel safe staring, as if looking long enough will reveal whatever it is he’s not saying.

I used to have a sort of sixth sense when it came to Noble, who almost never volunteered his feelings. If I’m around him for a little while, will that come back?

Do I want it to?

His eyes flick open and land on mine, and I force my face back into neutral.

“You were the only person I ever showed this place to, you know,” I say, turning away, because apparently I like to share vulnerable things with the guy who broke my heart.

Don’t be so pathetic, Hattie.