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Fresh tears spring to my eyes at the memory, and try as I might to blink them away, one slips onto my cheek. Xed sits up quickly, his brows pinched as he wipes it away, and the scar from where I accidentally hit him has me taking a shuddering breath.

“Listen to me,” he says firmly, grabbing my face in both hands. “Nothing is ruined. We both fucked up. It sucks, yeah, but now we get a chance to move on with our lives. Don’t spend right now in the past. Let’s make some new memories, baby. Together.”

His lips find mine, and I swallow hard, nodding as I close my eyes. “Okay. Together.”

“Always.” Placing a hand on my chest, he pushes until I get the hint. When my back hits the pillows, he straddles me, spitting into his palm before wrapping it around my cock. “Now let me make you feel good.”

And he does. So. Fucking. Good.

I thrust up into his hand, groaning at the way he swipes his thumb over my tip, precum already slipping out. He uses it to coat his fingers before bringing them to his ass with a wince.

“We really need to invest in lube before we get hemorrhoids.”

A loud laugh bursts out of me, but I bite my lip in embarrassment as I reach over to open the drawer to my bedside table, fiddling with the lock. “Well…actually…”

Pulling out a small bottle, I hand it over sheepishly, heat creeping up my neck when Xed’s sharp gaze focuses on my face.

“Why do you have lube next to your bed, Matthew?”

“Um.” My gaze flies to the dildo resting in the drawer before I slam it shut, praying with all my might that he didn’t notice.

My prayers go unanswered.

“Matty.” He leans over me, yanking open the drawer before I can stop him, and the next thing I know, the giant dick is waving around my face. “Have you been using this on yourself, big guy? Fuck, it’s even uncut. Like…”

“Like you,” I finish quietly, running my hands up his thighs.

He gazes at me for a moment, every emotion in the book running across his face. Heat simmers in his eyes when he lays his body on top of mine, our lips hovering inches from each other. “Did you use this and imagine it was me, baby?”

A whimper unfurls in my throat as I roll my hips against him, my hard cock trapped between us. “God, yes, every single time. I fucking missed you so much, Ducky.”

“Mm,” he hums, kissing me lightly before setting the dildo back in the drawer. “We can play with that later. Right now, I need you to get me ready.”

Using his thumb, he pops the cap on the bottle before handing it to me, and I groan when he reaches back to spread his cheeks while still lying on my torso.

“I want to see,“ I whine, squirting lube directly down his crease before slipping my fingers through it. “How come you got to stare at mine earlier, but I have to root around in the dark?”

“Please never use those words again,” he glares at me, resting his chin on my chest. “We’ve got our whole lives to stare at each other’s assholes, Matty. I promise. I’m not going anywhere.”

Those words settle something deep in my soul, all the tension leaving my muscles as I swirl my finger around his tight pucker, feeling it clench. “Yeah. Our whole lives. I love the sound of that.”

His face softens, a small gasp leaving his lips when I slowly slip inside of him. “I love you.”

“I love you, too. Always.”

Xed scoots up my body, pressing his lips to mine while I finger him gently, working him open for me. It’s slow and lazy, the way our tongues slide together, small moans passing from his mouth to mine as I add a second finger, searching for that special spot. We have all the time in the world.

His cock rubs against my abs as he writhes his hips, and I’ve barely gotten three fingers deep when I find what I’m looking for.

He lets out a strangled groan before shooting into a seated position, his chest heaving. “I’m going to come if we don’t stop.”

I start to snort, but it turns into a grunt when he pours more lube into his palm and wraps it around my length. “Isn’t that the point? Why would we stop?”

“So I can ride your cock, baby,” he breathes, getting me nice and slick before lifting on his knees.

“Oh fuck, yeah, I like that idea.” I grip his waist he slowly slides onto my dick, making me see stars. “Oh God, oh God, fuck me.”

Xed’s hand slaps over my mouth when I let loose a groan, and he presses a finger to his lips when he starts to move. “Shh, quiet. Not so loud.”