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He set down a book I didn’t recognize on my desk and tapped it with the flat of his palm. “Magdalena found this book. I think you should read it. Learn about your body. Learn to take care of it, and this will get easier.”
Tears prickled in my eyes. “You’ve forgotten one important thing.”
“What?”
“It’ll only get harder, because there isn’t a cure for Lobofebris.”
“You’re stable right now. Get through your Heat, then you can refocus.”
Anger swelled surprisingly fast after everything we’d just done. “I don’t have the time. I need to find the cure before I fully go into Heat. Because after that …” I thought of my mother’s threat. “In any case, our time working together has to come to an end.”
He went still and silent. Then with the utmost calm, he said, “I don’t think you have more than a day or two before Heat, based on how things are progressing.”
“Not if I have any say in it.”
“You don’t. You only have a say in how you handle it. Which is—”
“To do whatever you say?” I folded my arms and tilted my head.
He sighed with resignation. “No, Aura. It’s to know your boundaries and express them to me so I’m aware. It’s to have a plan in place while your mind is still clear. If your home isn’t safe, where is?”
I uncrossed my arms and glanced around. My office always felt safe, but it wasn’t exactly meant for … Gods, I couldn’t believe this was something I actually had to think of. “With these mysterious lycan attacks, it’s not safe for you to stick around here for much longer. I don’t want you getting the blame just because you’re here. And with these inconvenient lycan things currently eclipsing my own bloody life, Blucrux Valley isn’t where I should be either.”
“So where is safe?”
“I can talk to Magdalena.” The moment the words left my lips, I realized how ridiculous it sounded. My eyes brimmed with tears as self-depreciating laughter snuck past my lips. “How does one casually discuss this with a friend? Hi, Mags. Can I stay in your cottage for a few days so Sylvan can fuck me into oblivion until this Heat is over? Thank you so very much?”
His snort of laughter disarmed my bitterness. “Maybe not that wording,” he said.
“Look, I know most Primal Born vampires aren’t used to close bonds like lycans are, but Magdalena understands you. She loves you; I can tell. Explain the situation. Grab this inconvenience, as you put it, by the balls and show it who’s boss. Then you can go back to being a supercilious vampire until the next Heat.”
I lifted a brow. “Supercilious, huh?”
“Impressed with my vocabulary?” He grinned.
Aroused was more like it. I cleared my throat. This damn Heat was going to kill me. “Alright, please get out of my office. And be careful out there.” The thought of something happening to him drummed up fear in me.
He nodded. “I’m keeping a low profile at the inn. So, if you need me at any point, you know where to find me.”
I nodded, and he pulled a handkerchief from his pocket. He set it down atop the book and gave it a pat.
“Isn’t that the kerchief you just used to clean yourself?”
“No!” he exclaimed. “This is a fresh one. It’s been in my pocket all day. Untouched.
“Oh …” He didn’t seem bothered by the strange look I gave him.
“I’ll be back tomorrow. We can discuss your discoveries then.”
He left the room, and the moment he did, my focus locked onto the handkerchief he’d left behind. I picked it up with every intention of throwing it into the rubbish bin, but when my fingers closed around it, I caught the scent. His scent. I inhaled deeply, my nose buried in the soft material, my eyes drifting closed. His phantom touch thrummed through me along with the soothing depth of his voice and sincerity in his amber eyes.
Safe, that inner voice whispered. Understood. Respected. Desired.
And above all, utterly fucked.
31
HEAT RESEARCH
