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It took a lot of grappling to get my mind to focus on just this. He stood up and headed into the kitchen. I stared down at the healed scratches on my arms, struggling to believe that just days ago I couldn’t stop myself when the itch happened. I couldn’t stop the surges of anger or the thirst. It wasn’t until Sylvan extended a cup of blood to me that I realized just how thirsty I was.

I drank slowly, and everything from the past few days trickled back into my mind. My escape from the authorities as they tried to arrest me, Shan’s death, the fact that I’d walked into some kind of fucking ritual, and that bizarre lapse in memory before I awoke. The fact that Bellatrix likely wasn’t my birth mother. It explained so much and so little at the same time.

My ears perked up at the sounds of footsteps outside the cottage. The door opened, and Magdalena’s briefcase dropped to the floor. “Aura!” She ran to me, slowing down to drop at my side and carefully wrap her arms around me. I tilted my head into her awkward embrace, and when she pulled away, I gave her a shaky smile. “You scared the shit out of us,” she said.

She looked drained, dark circles under her purple eyes.

“Are you alright?” I asked.

“Fine now that you are awake.” She glanced at Sylvan. “There’s been another attack. Same injuries. Same speculation of it being a lycan. But not just a lycan, they’re specifically blaming Aura now. Bellatrix is backing the accusations, apparently.”

My heart plummeted as Bellatrix’s face flashed in my mind. As the phantom grip of her hand on my chin resurfaced. I jolted before my memories seemed to fade again. “I think she did something,” I said, my voice coming out as a mere whisper. “To Shan. To me. Her mind control shit with Shan’s runic knowledge. I know that sounds farfetched and no one would believe that.”

“I believe you,” said Magdalena. Sylvan nodded in agreement. “There’s going to be an emergency Ministry meeting. I’m sorry to tell you this as you wake up.”

“When?” I asked.

“Tomorrow.”

I glanced to the curtain drawn window. The sun hadn’t risen yet. That gave us a bit of time. Just a bit. “Did you find out anything? I wonder if it’s possible Shan had been compelled to do that ritual. If my mother had been compelling him, it would also explain how she got her hands on my lycan repel.”

Mags nodded. “I found Irving wandering around the night of your arrest. He seemed very confused.”

“That’s been happening at home, too. He’s been wandering in my room, I think.”

I nearly dropped the cup still clutched in my hand as pieces of the puzzle fell into place. I can’t stop, Shan told me. There had been a familiar scent on him. I knew it well, but I hadn’t been able to figure it out at the time.

“Bellatrix,” I growled. “But what would she have been compelling him to do? What if …” My stomach soured. When I met Irving, it was like finding lost kin. I’d been drawn to him. Could it be that my mother was the one who’d Turned him?

Magdalena stood and grabbed a weapon, showing it to me. I took it in my hands. Shan’s blood. As the memories washed over me, I handed it back to Magdalena. “It’s alchemized metal,” I said. “It likely fuses to the arm when under compulsion.”

“Could she have been using both Irving and Shan?”

“That woman would stop at nothing to make lycans look bad.” I looked at Magdalena then at Sylvan. “I need to get to that Ministry meeting,” I said.

Magdalena and Sylvan looked at me as though I’d lost it.

“Mags, I need you to do something for me. I know you like being a nightwalker, but I have a daylight ring in my stash. If you can get your hands on some truth serum, I think I know how to modify it to expose Bellatrix. Make it into a compulsion serum. I have to basically reverse engineer what I did to make my ear cuff. Laced with my blood, the potion will …” I trail off, since they looked beyond confused. “Get me another glass of blood, and I’ll explain,” I said.

Sylvan settled in the tub across from me. Magdalena had since returned from the university with the potions and had retired to her room to get some rest. My stomach was a tangle of anxiety as I thought of what needed to be done in the coming hours. Sylvan had offered me more drinks than I could take. I’d taken a few rejuvenate potions and was feeling far better than I had in ages.

The water sloshed as I ran my fingers through my wet hair. It had been too long since I detangled it, and I cursed every time my fingers caught. Sylvan grinned at me from across the tub. “Have I mentioned how beautiful your hair is?”

“Eat shit,” I mumbled.

He burst into laughter. “Do you want help?”

“Why would I need your help to comb out my hair?”

“Again, it’s not a matter of need, my wolfsbane. It’s a matter of letting someone take care of you. By the gods, vampires.”

I batted my lashes at him and smiled like a coquettish human. His eyes rolled and he laughed. As I lathered my body carefully with soap, Sylvan’s gaze on me was steady. He wasn’t just looking at me but peeling back layer after layer, staring into the very depth of who I was. Every now and then there was a whiff of guilt in the air. I wasn’t sure how to bring up my awareness of it—I wasn’t sure if I was misreading it.

“Sylvan?”

His brows crawled up his forehead.

“What aren’t you telling me?”