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He took me home.

And then he let me leave because I asked him to.

“I thought it would go away.”

“What would?”

“This.” I press my hand against my chest. “Missing him. Wanting to call him. Wanting to tell him things. I thought if I gave myself time and built a life and figured out who I am now...” I shake my head. “I thought eventually I'd stop.”

Mamma watches me.

“Why?”

I look at her. “Because I still love Damiano.”

“Of course you do.”

“Mamma...”

“What?”

“I can’t—” I lower my voice when someone passes our table. “I can’t love them both.”

Her eyebrows pull together.

“Who told you that?”

I stare at her.

“Nora, our hearts have enough room to love more people without diminishing the love we feel for each of them.”

I don’t move.

Something about those words finds a place inside me that’s been locked for almost two years.

“Loving Jude doesn’t take anything away from Damiano,” she continues softly. “Nothing. What you had with your husband is yours. It happened. You loved him and he loved you. Another love cannot go backward in time and make that smaller.”

My eyes burn.

“But—”

“No.” Mamma takes my hand. “You keep thinking you have to stop loving Damiano before you’re allowed to love someone else. Why?”

I open my mouth.

Nothing comes out.

Because...

Fuck.

That’s exactly what I’ve been doing.

Waiting.

Waiting for some magical morning when I wake up and Damiano doesn’t live inside my heart anymore.

I don’t want that morning.