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I jump to my feet and rush toward my phone. I could've sworn I deleted it from my playlist.

My fingers fumble with the screen, but it won't unlock. It doesn't recognize my face.

“No, not now... please, not now.”

The first notes fill the room, and suddenly every dance we've ever shared comes rushing back. Our first one in the park, the one in our kitchen while dinner burned on the stove because neither of us wanted to let go, and the one on New Year's Eve, when we held each other so tightly it felt like we could stop time if we just loved hard enough.

I remember the way his arms always felt like the only home I'd ever need, how my head fit perfectly against his shoulder and his fingers always found mine without looking. How my soul never felt lonely when he was near.

I sink onto the bedroom floor and cry.

Somewhere beneath the music I can almost hear his voice singing along.

Those lyrics.

I always thought they were about a future we'd grow old enough to live together. Now they sound like a cruel joke.

The song ends, and silence fills the house again.

I wipe my face with the sleeve of my sweater and slowly push myself to my feet. I need air. I need to get out of this house before the walls start closing in.

I grab my purse and the rental car keys.

“This town has to have somewhere that serves alcohol,” I mumble as I type it into my phone, which has suddenly decided it does know my face.

One place pops up.

Midnight Rodeo.

I shrug, start the engine and pull onto the empty road. I don't want to think anymore. I just want the pain to stop.

CHAPTER 7

Jude

I’m fixing dinner when my phone goes off.

Dex.

“Bro,” I answer.

“Jude, there’s this young woman here. Dark hair, dark eyes...” He sighs. “She came in two hours ago and hasn’t stopped drinking. Now she keeps mumbling about a man named Damiano.” He pauses. “I mean she looked familiar but... she’s not... she can’t be D’s widow, right?”

I’m already grabbing my keys. “She is.”

“Fuck.”

“Yeah.”

“You okay?”

Silence.

“I’ll be there in five.”

***

When I get to the bar, I find Lexy waiting tables and Dex’s concerned eyes fixed on someone.