Read My Roommate Is Trying To Kill Me Online Free by Maya-Gawonii Shabazz-Saleh

— makes me feel weird about being noticed

— encouragement may be suspicious???

— very good at making things feel normal after being weird

— possibly uses humor to redirect

— possibly uses charm to disarm

Hakeem read the last line again.

Then, underneath it, he typed:

— fear response getting complicated

He deleted it immediately because it sounded like therapy homework.

He tried again.

— cannot tell if I want him distracted or looking directly at me

He stared at that one much longer.

That was the real problem now. Not the possibility that Antonio’s charisma might be tactical, though Hakeem still believed that remained on the table. The real problem was that fear had stopped behaving cleanly. It no longer arrived as a simple warning. It arrived brightened by anticipation and attention. By the sick, thrilling knowledge that Antonio could put his hands on him any way he wanted, and turn Hakeem’s entire body into a confession.

Hakeem set the phone facedown on the bed. He looked toward his bedroom door as if the wood itself might offer him a better answer. He sat up quickly, went to the door, and locked it.

The truth, stripped ugly and shining, was this: He was no longer sure where being afraid of Antonio ended, and wanting Antonio’s attention began.

Chapter Five

Marginalia

Layla finished Mercy House.

Hakeem knew before she said a word. She was sitting on the crate behind the bar with the paperback face down on her thigh, one hand pressed flat against the cover, as if she were holding something in place. Her eyeliner was smudged beneath her left eye. She looked like a woman who had been emotionally burglarized and was still deciding whether to call the authorities.

"Don't talk to me," she said when he rounded the bar.