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“You’re actually quite good at sarcasm now that you’ve stopped thinking yourself above it. So, let’s say I find out where they’re lodged—easy—and I get you out of here—possible. We go to their quarters undetected—hard—and get past their guards both half-giant and goblin—all but fucking impossible—and get away without being caught—fucking impossible. What’s to stop the Horde from sending more ambassadors?”

She thought about this for a moment. At length she said, “They might. But these will not be able to tell what they have seen here. And if you were a king, and another king allowed your trusted ambassadors to be killed in his capital, would sending more ambassadors be the only option you consider?”

“I don’t know,” I said.

“Speak from your bones, not your bowels.”

This shamed me a bit, as it was meant to. I had been letting my cowardice run my mouth. I hate killing, and I hate even worse the thought of the world without me in it, but a world without that nonet of goblins and all they were learning here seemed a much prettier place.

“If I did send ambassadors, they’d be less friendly, and better escorted. And if I was in a bad enough humor, I might send assassins instead.”

She nodded.

She gripped my arm and looked in my eyes like she was trying to pour her courage into me.

Jubel the tiger, who had been looking at us with interest all the while, now rested her chin on her paws as if to say, “You’re wasting your time with that one.” But I did feel braver with the strength and warmth of her hand on me.

Just that little bit braver.

So we started planning.

I would find out all I could the next day, and the next night, we would strike. Of course, this wasn’t enough time to plan properly, and when I’d get to sleep before this karkery was a bothersome question; but we had no idea when these bastards were leaving and we couldn’t let them get away.

Of course, while mortals write plans in wet sand, the gods send the tide in briny waves.

We were slaves, weren’t we?

The levers of our fate seemed to rest in other hands.

And cruel hands, at that.

“Kitch, Kitch, you’ll never believe it!” Renata said.

“What is it, fair princess? Have the clouds begun to rain rubies on us?”

“No, silly!”

“Have the cats of the palace learned to sing songs in harmony?”

“No, but I would like that!”

“So would I. Have—”

“Father is having an extra day of games today! We’re going to get to see your little friend with the tiger fight again, and the tiger will fight, too.”

My face sank about a quarter of the way it could sink before I caught it and forced it to look something like jolly again.

“What good news!” I said as brightly as I could while I clenched my arse as hard as a parrot’s beak, I swear it could have cracked an almond.

“Yes, yes! The hivelings like games, and that’s why Father’s having games before and after the Apocalypse. They’re leaving on Apocalypse day, but he wants to make them happy. He’s thinking about declaring them our Friends in the East. Aren’t they adorable? Maybe he’ll let me have one.”

“I hope he does!” I said. “I hope you get three of them, and you can see how they like to play Hoodman Blind! Or you can find out what they do when you tickle them!”

In the course of my time with the half-giants, I got to see a lot of things die on the black sand. Giants, halfies, kynd. Bears, lions, elephants, and brassworms. Goblins and even a cyclops. Maybe you’d like to hear about all of it, but the truth is I don’t remember it all. And even if I did, I have only so much stomach for the telling. I’ll pass by the other bloodsport arranged for the extra day of games to please the goblin embassy, or the “hivelings” as they were politely called by the Erydoni, and get on to the main event.

See, Galva had made friends in the ludus and had made no secret of her history as a goblin-killer. It hadn’t mattered all the way out here, had it? But now we had goblin ambassadors in court, representing the high holy hives in Old Kesh, Urrimad, and the archipelago. And what would amuse these important little cunts more than watching random kynd and giants die?

Watching a goblin-killer from the wars in Gallardia die.