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I get through it until what we were willing to lose. The next words won’t come.

Daurek waits. I clear my throat and finish.

“I thought I was giving them the only thing they needed.”

“Have you told her that?”

“Constantly.” I wipe my face with the damp cloth. “She’s probably tired of hearing it.”

“What would you say if she were here?”

I almost start explaining the deadline on the loan. Then I picture Asha in the doorway, tired from work, wanting to know why I won’t answer her.

“I miss you,” I say.

Daurek’s hand closes gently around my ankle. I put the letter on the bed and lean forward until my forehead rests against his shoulder.

He holds me there. I’m grateful he hasn’t offered to bring my sister here before I finish crying, though he probably could have a message halfway to the border by supper.

After a while I sit up.

“Would you take me to see them? After the hearing?”

“I’d like to meet them. Ask Asha when she wants us.”

Us. I picture him beside me when Asha opens the door.

“She’ll have questions,” I say.

“So she should.”

I smooth a leaf along his shoulder.

When he goes to the midday meal, I stay at the ledge. I write that I miss her. I tell her the offer in Karath interests me, that Daurek makes me happy, and that I’ve been treating every answer as if choosing one means I can never see anyone else again.

I stop before I turn that into a promise to visit next week. I don’t know how long the hearing will take, or whether I’ll meet the Karath factor afterward.

I want to come and see you. Let me work out when. You can use the cup until then.

I sign the letter and take it to Ziku to send with the first. He adds it to the bag for his afternoon station run. For once, the page ends before I’ve found a solution for everyone.

DAUREK

The new records clerk carries one slim book to my morning meeting. Neimura used to arrive with enough paper to keep me at the table until noon.

It is the morning after Asha’s letter arrived. The clerk leaves the book beside the route map and goes.

“Neimura is finishing the older boundary copies today,” Reivaka says.

“Have him bring them.”

She stays where she is.

I have given that order so many times that I hear nothing wrong with it until she glances at the book the clerk has left.

“For you to check,” I add. “Then I’ll see him.”

“About his work?”