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“You fucked yourself with a candle?”
I nod weakly. It’s easier than speaking when my throat feels too tight with shame. I know it’s wrong. The confession sounds stupid the second I say it out loud. Yet Edwin keeps pulling truths from me that I’ve spent years hiding.
“Did you cum?” His hand moves again, unhurried as it pleasures me, and I stop trying to decide what I should feel. My body already knows.
“I think so.”
“That’s not something you guess about.”
The bed shifts before he’s kneeling on the floor between my legs.
His hands move up my thighs and hook into the waistband of my leggings. He drags them down, taking my panties with them.
I resist the urge to hide myself. Edwin wants to see me.
He looks up at me with a need I’ve never seen before. I couldn’t imagine that kind of desire being directed at me, and I don’t understand what he hopes to take from it. If it’s only sex, I’m sure he could get it from any other woman.
“You deserve to feel something memorable.”
This isn’t the first time he’s exposed me, but the feeling is completely different with his face right in my crotch.
He pushes my thighs apart, and I lean back on my hands. His fingers graze my skin before finding my sweet spot again. Small circles with slow pressure on my clit and I’m already breathing hard. All I can do is surrender to it.
“Relax, Zaiya.” He hooks his arms under my legs and yanks me onto my back, and I let out a startled gasp. My pussy opens helplessly. “This part will feel good.”
I squeeze my eyes shut the second his mouth touches me. I can’t bear to look. Warmth mixes with the movement of his tongue. Sensation blurs into heat. He devours me, needing my taste, coaxing sounds out of me I’ve never made before.
My fingers clutch the blanket. I’ve spent my whole life being still. Now my body wants to move.
His touch is what I’ve been waiting for. In all the sexual fantasies I stole from books, I never dared to think about this. A man’s mouth on me, giving me pleasure just because.
A moan slips out, and I clap a hand over my lips.
He stops and looks up from between my legs. “Don’t stop yourself. I want to hear you sing.”
Two fingers push inside me, and I cry out, only to clamp my jaw shut again. I close my eyes and shake my head. I don’t want to be loud. I don’t want anyone else in the house to know how dirty I am.
An irrational part of me is certain Mother will know I let myself be touched this way and now I’m ruined forever. It doesn’t matter how good it is.
“No?” he asks softly.
He stands, catches my ankles, and brings my legs together, lifting them in the air.
The look on his face is equal parts mischief and cruelty.
“Don’t be afraid to be naughty, Zaiya.”
He smacks right down between my legs.
I suck in a sharp breath.
Shock comes first. Then the sting. Then a hot pulse low in my body.
“Do I need to force you to let go?” he asks.
My clit throbs involuntarily. I bite down on my lip, my heartbeat thudding harder. Why do I love those words?
He smacks the same place again. Pain blooms hotter this time. His grip on my ankles tightens and his hand moves faster, leaving my most sensitive skin flushed and throbbing.