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“You don’t think I’m worried?” I laugh. I’ve been more worried than I have been in years. “You have no idea what’s been going on in my mind since you showed up here, Hawk. It’s like you brought all this with you when you came.”
His eyes narrow at me. “You think this is my fault? Maybe I see more than you do. Maybe this has been a problem all along.”
“You need to leave, Hawk. I’m not about to listen to you tell me that I’ve been living my life with my eyes closed. That’s the last thing that I’ve been doing. You think you know how I’ve been living all these years, but you don’t.”
“I’m not going anywhere.”
“Hawk, I’m not asking.” I stand and walk towards the door, pulling it open and waiting for Hawk to leave like I asked.
“Shut the door, Tessa.”
I don’t.
“Tessa.” He growls my name as he stalks over to me, pulling the door from my hand and closing it with a click. He keeps his hand on the door, above my head as he brings his face towards mine. His sky-blue eyes darken. “Leaving you isn’t possible. Not anymore.”
I put my hand on his chest to push him away, but as soon as my hand touches the fabric of his shirt, he wraps his hand over mine. He takes another step towards me, pressing his body to mine. His eyes flick to my lips. Subconsciously, I bring my tongue out, wetting the target of his gaze.
“Hawk–”
“No.” His head shakes slightly. “Tessa, please don’t ask me to do something that I’m unable to do. You can ask me to do anything else, but not that. Please don’t ask me to leave because I’m sorry, baby, but that’s not about to happen.”
Before I can argue, his lips come down on mine. Wiping away all the reasons why I need him to leave. Washing away all my worries because for the first time in years I feel like I’m not alone and I need to learn to accept that fact.
Tessa
My heart races, but not in fear.
Anticipation.
“This is how it’s going to go down,” he says as he locks the bedroom door. My eyes dart behind him. “We’re going to take this at your pace, Tessa. Do you understand?” I nod. He kicks his boots off then slowly approaches me. He takes my hand and I don’t flinch, which makes him smile. “Touch me.” He places my palm on his chest. I can feel the power of his heart as it beats against my touch. “Do you know how long I’ve thought about this? Tell me what you want.”
I close my eyes, trying to find the courage. “I’m scared.”
“I’m here.” He brings his hand up, and I feel his fingers at the nape of my neck. “Tell me what you want.”
“You.” I keep my eyes closed.
I feel his lips brush against mine. “Tell me, again Tessa.” The whisper of his voice sends chills down my body.
Pictures of the past float through my mind. Memories of the one night I had with him. The feel of his skin against mine, the look in his eyes as he pushed into me for the first time. Fear courses through my body; it trembles with both need and trepidation.
Without words, I tug at the hem of his shirt, bringing it up and over his head. I finally open my eyes and take in the smoothness of his chest. His muscles are more defined than when I last saw him. I hesitate for a moment, but then I run my hand over the muscles of his stomach. When my nails scrape along his skin, his muscles tense and he sucks in his breath. I bring my eyes to his. My Hawk. He smiles and gives a nod of his head. My fingers hit the top of the waistband of his jeans, and I stop. With trembling fingers, I try to unbutton the metal button of his jeans, but I’m not able to. I let out a shaky breath and bring my eyes to his.
“Tell me,” he pants.
“I…I want you.”
Without taking his eyes from mine, he places his hand over mine on his jeans, and he unbuttons them in one smooth motion. He takes my fingers in his and puts them on the zipper. My heart rate spikes and my mouth runs dry with the thought of what’s about to happen. “I got you, Tessa,” he says as we both work his zipper. “I’ve always got you, sweetheart.” As soon as his pants are undone, they fall away from his waist, sliding down his legs and pooling at the floor. I suck in a breath when I realize he isn’t wearing anything. When I hear him chuckle I look up into his eyes and swallow.
“Tell me,” he says again.
My tongue darts out and wets my lips. I take a deep breath and speak the words he’s waiting to hear. “Make love to me, Hawk.”
“My fucking pleasure.”
His lips fall to my neck, kissing upward, nipping at my ear. He groans as he continues to lick at my skin. My mind races as my heart beats frantically in my chest. I’m uncertain of what I should do, so I start to pull my shirt over my head, but he bats my hands away.
He pulls his lips from my skin and looks at me. “I’ve been waiting years to undress you again, Tessa.” His voice is thick with emotion. “Please, baby, don’t take that away from me.” When I nod, he smiles and pulls the fabric from my body. His eyes drop to my chest. “Fuck, I knew you weren’t wearing a bra,” he growls as his fingers bite into the flesh of my waist while his eyes roam over my body. He picks me up, tossing me softly onto the bed. I laugh, and it feels so good.
