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“I know.” Quinn squeezed my hand gently, his gaze meeting mine and holding it. “It must have been really difficult to tell me all of that.”

I shrugged, wanting to look away, but not bringing myself to do it. “It’s not exactly stuff I’m proud of.”

He frowned at that. “Why not? It wasn’t your fault. None of it was.”

“I should’ve known—how does someone not know that his boyfriend is the son of a mafia boss? There must’ve been signs I missed. I’ve been turning over every little detail for years, asking myself—”

“No. Derek, c’mon. You couldn’t have known. That was on him for not telling you. He let you get involved with him under false pretenses. And it cost you everything.”

Guilt tore through me at his words and I finally looked away. I let out a long breath, rubbing my forehead with my fingertips. “Exactly like what I did to you.”

“Hey. No. That’s not what I meant at all.”

“It’s true, though,” I said, my gaze glued to the floor. “Holy crap, I involved you in all of my bullshit. And you’ve got your own stuff going on.”

“Look, if you’re determined to feel shitty about yourself, I can’t stop you. But for the record, I’m glad you involved me. If you’d just vanished, or if something had happened to you…”

When he trailed off and went silent for a long moment, I looked back over at him. His gaze was now locked on the far wall, but he didn’t seem to really be seeing it at all.

“I’ve witnessed so much death and darkness,” he said, speaking at last. “I’ve caused so much of it. And I thought I knew what grief felt like. But if something happened to you, I know it wouldn’t even be close. Even the possibility of it makes me feel like—”

He broke off, swallowing hard, dropping his gaze to the ground and shaking his head.

“It makes you feel like what?”

He raised his eyes to meet mine. “Like I’d tear the whole world apart to protect you. I wouldn’t stop—no matter what—until you were safe.”

“You don’t really mean that, do you?”

“There’s a monster inside me. The first time you smiled at me, it went to sleep and I felt like a person again. I wanted to be a person again, for you. You tamed it with everything you are. But if you were threatened…” He shook his head, the expression on his face grim. “I know I’d let the monster back out in a heartbeat, so long as it kept you safe. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do.”

“Quinn,” I breathed, feeling suddenly overwhelmed by everything he’d just said. I wasn’t sure what else to say. I pulled him into a fierce hug, wrapping my arms around him. Quinn returned the embrace, his touch gentle, even though he was capable of such impossible strength. My voice was thicker than before when I said, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” he said, pulling out of the hug. “But I’m serious. Dead serious.”

“I know.” It was true—I knew that now.

“You’re not dying,” he said firmly. “Not today and not anytime soon. And you’re not giving up your entire life to go on the run, either. I’m not letting these assholes do that to you again.”

I stared at him. “What are you suggesting?”

Quinn smiled. “Your boyfriend-slash-fated mate is a vampire. Literally all of your friends are vampires. Hell, even the vampire king of the city himself would probably walk through fire to protect you.”

Nathaniel had definitely looked out for me on more than one occasion, when I’d had a few too many at the bar. There was a back room with a couch I’d crashed out on plenty. And he’d gotten me water and aspirin before, plenty of times.

But that was a far cry from stopping a mafia hit, wasn’t it?

This was too much to ask, even of my friends. And it was my problem to deal with. What if one of them got caught in the crossfire? A regular bullet wouldn’t kill them, but being shot would still hurt like hell, wouldn’t it?

“Come clean with everyone,” Quinn said quietly, watching me. “And let us help you.”

Everything inside of me rebelled at the idea. It went against everything I’d done for the past five years to keep myself and the people around me safe.

“You don’t have to be alone in this,” he added. “Not anymore. Not ever. Not unless you choose to be.”

“Let’s say I told everyone the truth and asked for help. What are you thinking? How do you think they’d help?”

“We,” he corrected. “And these mafia guys are humans, right?”