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Iget to the shop early this morning because I haven’t been sleeping well. Uncle John isn’t here working on anything, so I go to the back office and fire up the computer. Being alone is probably for the best right now.

It’s Sunday, and it’s been an entire fucking week since Dare left my apartment without a word. I’m about to crawl out of my skin. He still hasn’t responded to any of my texts or anything. I’ve checked my phone about eighty thousand times since last week, and I don’t know what to do.

I need to do something, though.

My sister’s off of work today, and so after I settle at my desk with a cup of coffee, I text her to see if she’s free. Maybe talking to someone about this will help. She texts back almost immediately to tell me that she has plans to hang out with Julian later but that she’s at our parents’ house now. I ask her to come over to the shop so I can talk to her.

An hour later, Lindsey texts me that she is at the front door to the shop, and I jump up out of my chair and hurry out of the office to let her in. She hands me a travel cup filled with warm liquid.

“I stopped for hot chocolate on the way over,” she says, coming inside and shutting the door behind her.

I take a sip and give an approving “mmmm." Then I lead the way to the office in the back, and we make ourselves comfortable.

“So,” she starts, looking at me pointedly. “Boy trouble?” Her face scrunches up, the dark lipstick on her lips disappearing as she flattens her lips and pulls them inward.

I chuckle. “How’d you know?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” she mocks. “An ominous text on a random Sunday morning by my big brother, asking if I’m free to talk? Kind of a dead giveaway, Lev.”

I blow air out and tilt my head back. “I don’t know what to do,” I tell her. She looks at me with her big blue eyes, encouraging me to go on. “He came back to my place after the bonfire last weekend. But you know that,” I add quickly as she smiles and nods.

“Yeah. Katie and Jenna were in the diner the other night and said he was with Ryan recently. What did he say when you guys talked again?” There’s a twisting feeling in my gut, and I’m not sure how to answer her. Her face goes serious. “Lev, please don’t tell me you haven’t talked to him since the bonfire.” I stay silent. “What the hell, Lev!?” She swats me on the arm.

“Owwww! I know, Linds. I know. I need to do something, but I thought I was giving him time, and I thought he needed to be alone. Then one day ran into the other, and now it’s a week later and I haven’t heard from him and”—I breathe—“I miss him.”

“Oh my GOD,” she huffs. “Why are you so archaic? Talk to him, Lev!”

“Archaic?” I repeat, raising my eyebrows at her.

“Yes, Lev. Archaic,” she repeats. “You mean you haven’t tried to talk to him since Sunday?”

“I texted him several times,” I say quietly. I suddenly feel like a fool. Saying these things out loud and seeing and hearing Lindsey’s reaction just brings to light what I think I was afraid of and that’s that I should have talked to him. I should have called Dare and forced a conversation with him to figure out what is going on.

The thing is, I tried. There were several times this week that I had his number pulled up on my phone to call him and then chickened out. For some reason, I got nervous and couldn’t do it.

“Lev,” my sister says, a little softening in her tone, “what do you want from this . . . thing with Dare? I’m going to say relationship, because the way you two were at the bonfire, that’s what it was. So do you know what you want out of this?”

That’s a no-brainer for me, and I tell her that. “I want him. I want to get to know him better and care for him and be with him. I want to . . . I want him, Linds.”

She puffs her bottom lip out in a pout and scoots closer to me so she can put her hand on my forearm. “You really like him, don’t you?” I nod in confirmation. She takes in a deep breath and lets it out. “I think you need to go to him and talk,” she tells me.

My head snaps up, and my eyes meet hers. “I . . . I want to, but it’s . . . um . . . I just . . .” She arches her eyebrows at me, waiting for me to explain myself. “I’ve only been in their house like once since Nate died. And Dare lives there. I haven’t been there, Linds. I don’t know if I can go through all that again.”

She takes her hand off my forearm and plays with the lid of her hot chocolate. I can tell she’s contemplating how to say whatever she’s about to say to me. She takes a breath and looks up at me. “Lev, I mean this with the most love I can give you.” Here we go. At least her voice is sincere. “I think you need to get over yourself and the house thing and go to him.”

Her words slam into me. She’s right, and I know she is.

“What happens if he decides that he doesn’t want this? Or me? What if I waited too long and let this go on too long without saying anything or doing anything? Now I’m worried that I messed it up.” My voice sounds like I’ve swallowed gravel, and my throat feels like it too.

God, I’m so pathetic.

I’m a twenty-four-year-old man who’s too scared to go back to a house that was familiar close to a decade ago to have a conversation with someone I have strong feelings for.

“Well, then you tell him that you want him and what you want out of this relationship. If he doesn’t want you, that’s his choice, right? But somehow, I don’t think that’s going to be the case. He’s gone for you, Lev. As much as you are for him. It’s obvious. He just handles things differently. He’s used to being alone and closing off. He’s probably scared. Worried. He went through some dark times while you were gone, you know?”

Neither of us speak for a few minutes, but her words swirl around in my head. I know she’s right. I need to talk to him.

Lindsey finally breaks the silence again. “The longer you wait, the harder it’s going to be,” she tells me quietly.