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A seagull lands on the sand a few feet from our table and stares at her. Goldie stares right back, which tells me exactly where this is going.
“Don’t,” I tell her before she can reach for another fry.
Her mouth twitches. “I’m not doing anything.”
She’s a fucking menace, and I love her for it. “You’re thinking about it.”
The bird takes a step closer, and Goldie reaches across the table anyway. She steals one of my fries and tosses it onto the sand before I can stop her.
I stare at her. “Did you seriously take my fry to feed a seagull?”
“He looked hungry.”
“So am I, and unlike him, I paid for those.”
“You still have a whole basket.”
“Also unlike him, I won’t shit all over our heads. Or the table.” More gulls land nearby, and I point at them. “See? You started something.”
Goldie grins, staring me down while she grabs a handful of my fries. She never takes her eyes off mine as she tosses them in the direction of the group of seagulls, which has grown to about two hundred in the last thirty seconds.
One even catches a fry before it can hit the ground.
The rest of the flock surges forward. Goldie yelps when one swoops low enough over the table to make her duck, then immediately starts laughing while I drag my basket closer before another one decides to get brave.
“Still think bringing this on was a good idea?”
“Shut up.” She wipes under one eye. “I regret nothing.”
Another gull lands on the edge of a nearby trash can and caws loudly at us.
Goldie points at it. “See? He appreciates me.”
“Pretty sure he just threatened us.”
She grins and wipes her fingers on a napkin while I keep one eye on the birds crowding the edge of the patio. At least none of them have gotten the balls to land on the table yet.
Goldie takes a drink and settles back against the bench. “So what are you gonna do with all your divorce money?”
“You mean after financing your French fry addiction?”
She grins. “Obviously.”
I laugh and reach for my drink. “I don’t know. Haven’t really thought about it.”
Her smile softens a little. “Is it weird that it’s finally over?”
I think about it for a second. “More relieving than weird.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. There’s nothing left to deal with, and Delia’s finally out of my life for good.”
She holds her plastic cup out toward me. “Then cheers to never having to talk about your ex-wife again.”
I tap mine against it, and she takes a drink before reaching for my fries again.
I pull the basket farther away.
