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There’s no judgment from me, but I’m hurt. First, because my best friend has spent his entire adult life alone when I was right here, and second, because he never told me any of this when he used to tell me everything. I know that’s unfair, but fuck. I knew there was something between us, and he deprived us both.

“I’m sorry I never told you,” he says like he’s reading my thoughts.

“It’s okay. I just wish I could have been there for you. I wish I could have fucked you a long time ago too.”

He laughs, then sobers. “I want to fuck you, but I don’t want to do it wrong.”

I smile. “I don’t think you can do it wrong.”

“I’m serious. I don’t want to hurt you. I’m,” he looks down, and back up, “a little bigger.”

“Oh, I’m well aware.” I love how big he is.

“I want to watch you prep me. I want to see how you fuck. I want to feel your knot inside me first.”

I press my fingernails against my lips. “Are you sure?”

He nods. “I want my best friend to fuck me.”

“Holy shit. Oh my god. Okay.”

20 TYLER

“First things first, are you comfortable? Do you need to go to the bathroom?”

I shake my head.

“Alright, lube is a must.”

I snort. “I’m not asking for a pedantic lesson. Top drawer.”

Alden is freaking the fuck out, and I’m grateful because I’m freaking the fuck out too.

Alden rummages through the drawer, then pauses. “Vetiver-scented?” His brow wrinkles.

I don’t feel any shame. He’s my best friend. “Yeah.”

“You’re such an asshole for jacking off to an artificial version of me when I was right down the hall.” He’s teasing, but I hear the hurt between his words.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. I mean, I wish I would have been brave enough to confront you before today. I get it.” He bows down and kisses me. “Okay.” He takes a deep breath and shakes out his shoulders like he’s about to run a marathon or something. “Let’s do this.”

“Alden, come here.” I curl up enough to drag him toward me, and kiss him, a long, lingering kiss until he relaxes. “You can’t fuck this up, remember? Take your own advice.”

He traps his bottom lip between his teeth, then releases it. “On your hands and knees.”

The command ripples through my bloodstream. It’s the command of an alpha. He helps me into position, then pushes down between my shoulder blades until my cheek touches the mattress. Then he pauses, hands gripping my hips so tightly, I hope he leaves bruises.

I’m about to whine like an omega when he says, “Goddamn, you have the sexiest body I’ve ever seen.”

Jealousy burns inside me. “I hate that you’ve seen anyone else’s body.”

“Likewise,” he says in a low growl, the possessive streak during an alpha’s rut mirroring mine. He roams his hands down my waist and over my ass, down to my thighs and back up to weigh the heft of my balls. “So fucking sexy.”

I squirm under his touch. My cock is trapped between my legs. The sensation of my knot swelling against me is delicious, but it’s not enough. He understands wordlessly, pulling my cock down and back. Then he kisses my lower back, on the left, then the right.

“I’ve always loved these dimples.” Then he descends lower, kissing the base of my spine, and then⁠—