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As You Wish

Page 122

by Elle Rivers

The three of us were on Gabriel’s couch, cuddling under blankets. We were watching an old cartoon that I spent my entire childhood loving, and I couldn’t be happier. Gabriel told me I could contact anyone if I needed help. So far, I hadn’t needed it.

I’d kept them fed and alive. That was a win in my book.

Did I need to sleep for a week? Absolutely.

I now understood why Grace upped her caffeine intake after having Sammy. I was seriously considering doing the same. These two were a full-time job.

Eventually, Agnes dozed off and I watched her with a small smile on my face.

Beatrice was still awake.

“Do you know my mommy?”

I paused. I knew what Gabriel had told me about her, but I didn’t know anything else.

“No, I don’t.”

“She’s the best mommy.” Beatrice frowned. “She went somewhere else, though. And she’s not coming back.”

“I’m sorry. People do that sometimes, in many different ways.”

“I’m sad. I don’t know what to do.”

“Sometimes there isn’t anything to do. Sometimes . . . life is just sad.”

“Gabriel left us too.”

My heart felt like it was beating out of rhythm. It took me back to the late nights when I was first accepting that Gabriel had left me.

“He’s coming back.”

“But he could go away again.”

My heart was cracking in two.

“He cares about you a lot,” is what I finally settled on. “So, he wouldn’t leave, if it were his choice.”

Beatrice was quiet. “I don’t know if I can like him.”

“Why not? He’s taking care of you.”

“Because he could leave. It’s not worth it to like him if he leaves.”

“It is,” I assured her. I knew, more than anyone, that I was speaking from experience. “I promise you it’s worth it, even if he leaves.”

The worst part about staying at Gabriel’s was that his bed was ridiculously comfortable. Even though I had never slept here, I felt at home and got better sleep than I did in my own place.

The first night, I tried to avoid it and slept on the couch. Instead, I woke up face down right in the center of the mattress. The second night, I didn’t even try to fight it.

I planned to change the sheets today and pretend I never slept here. What Gabriel didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him.

The door slammed open, and Agnes and Beatrice jumped on the bed. A knee hit me right in the kidney and I thought I was going to die.

“There you are!” Agnes said.

“We saw a raccoon this morning!” Beatrice yelled.

I slowly sat up, still recovering from whoever decided to attack me with their knee.