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I can’t look him in the eyes. Not while sharing this piece of my upbringing. I keep my focus on the corner of the room, studying the tall, potted snake plant that sits there.

“My dad hurt me growing up. I was a crazy kid—had too much energy, bounced off walls. He didn’t have the patience for it. What he thought was misbehaving was really my undiagnosed ADHD. He didn’t know, and he’d beat me.”

“Fuck,” I hear Enzo say under his breath.

“I want to be a school counselor, so I can help kids in similar situations. Ones who may not know they have neurodivergence because it can be tricky to diagnose in children, depending on the case,” I add.

“Did you tell your mom? Did she know?” Enzo quietly asks.

“I told her, and she’d listen but thought I was being dramatic. This was after my parents split, and I dreaded seeing my dad. It always went the same way. Feeling like I was walking on eggshells at his house, and as soon as one cracked, I’d feel it for days.” I suck in a sharp breath. “I think Rick knew. It seemed like once he was in my life, I no longer had to see my dad.” I tap my finger on the armrest. “He always believed me.”

“And that’s why you didn’t want to come this summer…”

I shift my focus to my toes—always painted in a neutral tone or black. “Yep.”

“Tilly…”

I wipe the underside of my nose with the back of my hand. “I thought you’d want to know what happened. I hated the idea of you sitting here, blaming yourself when this had nothing to do with you.”

“Thanks. I mean, I feel terrible. I promise I meant it to be playful, but I was worried I hurt you.”

I shake my head. “No, just stirred up some childhood trauma,” I whisper.

“I can’t believe your mom forced you to spend the summer with him,” he repeats.

“I know, but I figured he wouldn’t bother me now that I’m an adult. He’s calmed down a lot over the years, but I’ll never forget,” I say.

“I really don’t know what to say or do other than give you cuddles and tell you how gorgeous you looked tonight,” Enzo replies. My eyes lift, and I give him a small smile. But suddenly he frowns. “I can’t believe I snapped at you. No wonder you recoiled that morning.”

“E, you scared me. It was intense for both of us, but I realized fast that a drug was making you act that way. Not the real you.”

“Still, I feel like shit.”

“Don’t. You’re doing a lot better now.”

He sighs. “Is this why you always make things okay? You don’t react to things.”

I furrow my eyebrows at him. “What do you mean?”

“Like our first time, you came back for more. Or when you found all those pill bottles, you acted like everything was fine. You do that shit to avoid confrontation, don’t you?” My lips part, and my eyes dart between his face, the floor, and back to him. I start to speak, but my quickening pulse stops me. “It’s a defense mechanism for you.”

“Enzo, I–…” I trail off and suck in a deep breath. “I didn’t ask for a complicated boyfriend, and I just want you to be okay.”

“Well, now, it’s you who needs to be okay,” he quickly replies.

You will not cry, Matilda!

“I still asked you questions about your dosage and diagnosis.”

“Yeah, but the way you asked…you didn’t want to rock the boat.” He looks away from me. “Fuck, it all makes sense now. And you were judging me, Tilly.”

“No, not in the way you were thinking. I knew I could help you.”

“Now it’s you who needs help,” he whispers. “I don’t know what that looks like, nor do I think I’m the one for that. But the least I can do is make you feel safe.”

“And you do, Enzo.”

“You’re a fucking angel, and you deserve the best. I’m glad you found out my secret, and I know I got intense, but you’ll never know just how much I appreciate you.” He gets to his feet and holds out his hand. “Let’s go to bed and get settled, okay?”