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“What’s for dinner?” Alex asked, opening the carton and pouring himself a glass.
Justin put the frying pan in the sink. “Uh, I was thinking chicken fried rice maybe? I don’t know. Emma, what do you want?”
I only paused for a second. “I like fried rice,” I said.
He turned around to smile at me.
Alex pounded his juice and shoved a forkful of ham into his mouth. “I gotta go to school,” he said, talking around it.
Sarah slung her backpack over her shoulder. “Can you dye my hair again?” she asked me. “Tonight when you come?”
“Sure.”
She smiled and left through the garage for the bus stop. I got up and started clearing plates.
Only Chelsea was still at the table, eating a piece of waffle and wiggling like she had to go to the bathroom.
“Chels, go potty,” Justin said.
His sister nodded and jumped from her chair and ran down the hall. I set the plates in the sink and as soon as my hands were free he grabbed me and pulled me into an embrace. “Alone, finally,” he said.
I laughed. “For the next five seconds.”
He tipped my chin up to kiss me but I pulled back. “You don’t think we should lay off the PDA in front of the kids?” I whispered.
“I don’t see any kids…” He smiled and leaned in but I stopped him again.
“You kissed me on the cheek earlier,” I said.
He looked amused. “It’s good for them to see that. This is what I got to see when I was growing up.”
“Kissing in the kitchen?”
“A healthy relationship,” he said. “Two people in love.” He bent down and kissed me and I didn’t stop him this time.
It was a casual comment. Not a huge declaration or even something he expected a response to. Just stating a fact.
We’d only ever said we like each other more than like. We’d never said that word.
I’d never said that word.
We’d been tiptoeing around it for weeks. He was still tiptoeing, really. I think he sensed that I wasn’t ready for him to look me in the eye and say I love you, so he slipped it in this way instead.
He was right, I wasn’t ready.
Even though I did love him.
How easy it was for him to acknowledge this monumental thing. To say it out loud without fear that the universe would take it from him now that it knew what he needed to live. That’s what the universe always did to me. Took away the people I loved.
He still had his arms around my waist. Chelsea didn’t pay it any attention as she climbed back onto her chair to eat her breakfast.
“Sarah knows I stay the night,” I whispered. “Your brother too.”
His eyes went wide. “They do?”
“Yup.”
“Do you think we’ve been too loud?” he whispered.