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“Me and Justin made Mom’s cookies,” she said. “They came out good. He said you would have really liked them.”

The sudden mention of him mentioning me made my heart flip.

I’d missed so much. Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, his birthday, the kids’ birthdays. They had to hate me. How could they not?

“We miss you, you know,” she said.

The words caught me by surprise and I looked over at her.

“You do?”

She talked to the burger in her lap. “Everybody was like, really sad when you left.”

I swallowed. “They were?”

“Yeah. Like, I know you’re not, but it kind of felt like you were my big sister or something. You were our family.” She looked at me.

I studied her. “I felt like that too. I didn’t want to have to leave,” I said.

“Then why did you?” she asked.

I turned away from her.

“Sometimes you leave because it’s better to deal with your problems on your own.”

“Did you?”

I came back to her. “Yeah. I did. And I’m really sorry if my leaving hurt you. The last thing I wanted was for you to feel abandoned. I know what that’s like.”

“I didn’t feel abandoned,” she said, looking me in the eye. “’Cause I knew if I ever called you, you’d come.”

She said it so matter-of-factly. And it was funny, because the second she said it, I realized she was right. I would have.

Anytime over the last six months, I would have been there if she’d reached out.

I wasn’t like Amber.

Even small, I was better than she was.

And then she did call and I did come.

I’d passed a test I didn’t even know I’d been taking.

“When we get home, you should come inside,” she said. “I bet he’d want to see you.”

I had to muscle the lump down in my throat.

“Okay,” I whispered. “I’ll do that.”

I just hoped she was right.

CHAPTER 46

JUSTIN

I missed her. It was an ache in my chest that never went away. After six months, I’d accepted that it never would.

The first few weeks after she left were the worst. I was depressed. There was no skirting around it, it was depression.