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“How long were you together?” she asked.

“Three years. Dated for two, married for one. She cheated on me for most of it.”

“Ouch.”

“Yeah.”

She shook her head. “I never understand people who cheat in relationships.”

“You want to hear the worst part?”

“Uh, yes.”

“She cheated on me with her cousin.”

Her mouth fell open. “Noooooo.”

“Yeah. She met him on 23andMe.”

“She didn’t . . .”

“I swear to God. Second cousin, once removed. When I caught them, they were both wearing the purple T-shirts from the family reunion,” I said, talking around my straw.

“Shut UP.”

“Pecker Family Reunion 2023. It had a cartoon woodpecker on it, right here on the chest—”

Her face cracked, and she started laughing. “I’m sorry, it’s not funny—”

“No, it’s hilarious,” I said. “I mean, not at the time. Obviously. But in retrospect? I can appreciate it. The family resemblance is very strong. They look like siblings, which makes it so much more disturbing.”

She was dying. Her laughing made me laugh.

I’d never actually poked fun at this—I was definitely in a place to, mentally. I meant it, I was over it. But I hadn’t revisited it in the new, healed mindset I currently existed in. It was sort of freeing, finding humor in it. Finally.

“Do they have the same last name?” she asked.

“Yup,” I said, making a popping noise on the p.

“Oh, Seth.” She bit her lip. “Have you dated anyone since?”

“No. I’m too afraid. Once incest is on the table, it’s hard to trust again.”

She snorted.

“I’m sorry. Today must be rough.”

I shrugged. “Sort of? I’m not sad she’s gone. I mean, I was at first, of course. Then I realized she wasn’t who I thought she was, and I’d been living a lie, and what I really missed was a person who didn’t exist, if that makes sense.”

“It makes total sense.”

“Now I’m just grieving the life I don’t have anymore.”

She sighed. “Me too.”

“I miss having someone to do stuff with. To do stuff for. Inside jokes.”

“Shows to watch together that you’re not allowed to watch without each other,” she said.