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But it did.

Maybe Mike wasn’t the only one lying to himself. Maybe I’d been doing it too. And I didn’t want to do it anymore, didn’t want to do any of this.

I shook my head. “No, Mike. I’m not going to stay.”

I watched him shrink. This tall, strong, virile man withered in front of me.

“Larissa, I can change…”

“Good,” I said. “Then change for somebody else.”

39

CHRIS

Wait, slow down, what do you mean?” I said.

We’d been snowmobiling for two hours and had just made it to the bar. Mike was quiet when we left, hadn’t said a word on the ride, and now he was pacing in front of the men’s room telling us Larissa broke up with him.

“Broke up with you? For what?” Jesse asked.

Mike looked stricken. He didn’t answer.

“Just tell me what happened,” I said.

“Bro, you guys were living together for literally five seconds. How could you possibly fuck things up this fast?” Jesse said.

Xavier glanced at me, his face unreadable.

“When did this happen?” I asked.

“Right before we left,” Mike said.

I shook my head. “But why?”

He raked his fingers into his hair and squeezed. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Maybe she’ll take you back?” Jesse said. “Just apologize.”

“I did. It’s over.” Mike scrubbed his hands over his face. “She’s fucking done with me, dude.”

We all made eye contact with one another while Mike stood with his palms to his eyeballs.

“I want a drink,” he said.

“I don’t think that’s the best idea,” Xavier said.

“Me either. We’re on snowmobiles,” I said.

He took his hands from his face. “Fuck it. I don’t care.” Then he turned for the bar.

“Just do a beer!” Jesse called after him. Mike ignored him.

“Damn, the dude’s a mess,” he said, watching him go. “I’ll drive. We’re doubled up anyway.”

I squeezed the bridge of my nose. What the hell was going on?

Larissa was crying, Mike said they were fighting, now they broke up? I looked wearily over at the run-down bar.