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William was someone I cared about.
But not someone I could have.
I hoped that the love I was feeling for Little Christmas wasn’t because of the way I was starting to feel for him. I was terrified that the town would suddenly lose all its allure the second he was gone. Like the magic was William and not anything else.
How could anyone have a man like him and fumble it? I bet his ex regretted losing him every day of her life.
“Did she ever tell you why she did it?” I asked. “Your ex.”
“The cheating?”
“Yeah.”
He put his phone on his chest and stared up at the popcorn ceiling. “We talked about it. Tried therapy for a few weeks after, but… the damage was done.” He shook his head. “It basically boiled down to self-sabotage. She was unhappy being happy. Lots of stuff from her childhood. Stability didn’t really feel safe for her.”
“That’s kind of sad,” I said quietly.
He looked at me. “I just wish she would have talked to me about it. I would have helped her through it. If she would have let me.”
I held his gaze.
“My ex lived off me,” I said. “He didn’t even have his own car. He would take mine and then forget to pick me up from work.”
“Ouch.”
“It’s embarrassing,” I said. “I don’t know exactly what was the final straw or if my frontal lobe suddenly snapped into place, but I told him I couldn’t do it anymore. And then he emptied the bank account and got half the house.”
“As your lawyer, I would have never let that happen to you,” he said. “I would also never do that to you, as your husband.”
My face went soft.
“And I would never be unhappy being happy with you,” I whispered.
The way he looked at me hurt. It felt like I was losing something I never had.
“We should try and get some sleep,” I said.
He watched me another moment. Then he turned and flicked off the light.
When my phone rang four hours later, it jolted me from a dream like cold water.
William and I both shot up in bed. “It’s Big Al,” I said, looking at the name lit up on the screen.
William turned on the light and I answered the call on speaker.
“There’s a trailer in my parking lot…” Al said without saying hello.
I crossed my legs under me. “Al, I know it’s Christmas Eve and I am so super sorry, but I need a favor.”
“What kind of favor?”
“I have a sleigh with a broken slider. I need it fixed and I need it by tonight.”
He laughed so hard I had to pull the phone away from my ear. William and I looked at each other.
This wasn’t good.
“It’s Christmas Eve,” he said, still chuckling. “I’m not even working today. I just came to drop something off…”
