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And he couldn’t answer the phone.
The realization pounded inside his head as his hand shook, his thumb hovering over the Accept button, anxious to press down. It felt like fate was fucking with him. What were the odds she would call him now? How many times had he wished she would call him back, desperate for closure? But he couldn’t have that conversation here, on a crowded bus, let alone in front of Devra.
The call ended, and her name vanished.
His vanishing ex.
His armpits grew damp. His leg started to bounce. He needed to call her back. Right now. Before she had a change of heart and disappeared again.
He stood up, remembered he had nowhere to go, and sat back down.
“Are you okay?”
He saw Devra’s concerned expression, her red-rimmed eyes, and felt awful. This was her low moment. He was supposed to be comforting her right now, not the other way around.
“I’m fine.” He offered her his best totally okay smile. “Just need to stretch my legs. When’s the next stop?”
“Not until Kamloops.” She looked away and rested her head against the window, so different from the ride there, when she’d nuzzled into him. “Probably best to just get some sleep.”
Hours passed as he listened to Devra’s soft breathing. He kept touching his phone in his pocket, feeling phantom vibrations. He checked the time, the GPS. Twenty minutes from their scheduled stop, Bradley heard a rain-muted boom from outside, and the bus lurched before slowing to a stop. Bradley jumped to his feet, grateful he had the aisle seat, but before he could reach the exit, the bus driver held out a hand to stop him. “We’ve popped a flat. I ask everyone to remain safely on board since we’re on a narrow shoulder with poor visibility. I’ll contact dispatch—shouldn’t be more than a thirty-minute repair job.”
Bradley plodded back to his seat. Another thirty minutes might as well be another lifetime.
Devra stirred as he thumped down.
“What’s going on?”
“Just a flat tire.”
“Oh,” she said quietly. “Sorry about that.”
“Why? It’s not—” your fault, he was going to say, but she’d already rolled back over to the window and let out a whimper that sent pain directly to his chest.
Two hours later, the bus finally turned off the highway and into a service area.
As soon as they parked, Bradley rushed to the front door where the driver warned him in a hushed voice, so as not to disturb the sleeping passengers, that they needed to make up for lost time and he only had five minutes.
Bradley nodded, and the passenger door opened. Bone-chilling sleet, more punishing than any dry snow, hammered down on him as he stepped off. His hair was soaked by the time he made it under the gas station awning. Wet blobs weighed down his eyelashes. He pulled out his phone, hit her number, and prayed she would answer, that she would actually pick up this—
“Bradley, hey. Thanks for calling me back.”
Her voice was so familiar, that soft lilt that could rise to a vibrant boom once the drinks came out.
“Hey, Melissa.” Now that she was finally on the line, he suddenly forgot all the things he wanted to say to her. “I’m glad you called.”
“Yeah. Sorry it took me so long. I’ve been going through some stuff.”
“Me too.”
Silence fell between them, and Bradley felt precious seconds bleed away.
“I’ve, um, I’ve been trying to get in touch with you,” he said, finally finding his voice, “as you know. To reach out, because I know things ended badly between us, and that’s my fault. I take full responsibility for that. But I’m sober now, and I’d like to make it up to you. Not because I want to get back together or anything. I just want to make amends. To let you know how truly sorry I am. If you could tell me exactly what I did, I’ll do whatever I can to make it right.”
Melissa sighed heavily. “It isn’t what you did that night, Bradley.”
“It isn’t? But you slapped me. I remember that much.” She’d never done anything like that before. They’d never fought. He’d loved that about her, how easygoing she was, how she’d always laugh at his antics, relay his amusing behaviour to him the morning after and make him feel less ashamed. “I must have done something pretty awful to deserve that.”
Her slow exhalation blasted like static through the phone.
