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Once we were in the gear room, she set her coffee mug on the counter that ran the length of one wall. “So everybody doesn’t wear the same snowshoes?” she asked, approaching the opposite wall, which was lined with hooks and gear, snowshoes, cross-country skis, different varieties of packs, ski poles, and so on.
“Nope. What size shoe do you wear?”
“I wear a size six.”
I crossed over to where she was eyeing the snowshoes and reached up to snag a pair off the hooks. “These should work.”
When I glanced down, she was just right there. It was the most natural thing in the world to dip my head and kiss her. She let out a little soft sound of surprise against my lips but instantly opened her mouth underneath mine, and we tumbled right into it. She tasted like coffee with a hint of sweet. I drew back reluctantly.
Her eyes widened. “Just—Lincoln, we—just please don’t kiss me like that and then tell me we can’t do this.”
“I definitely didn’t say that,” I murmured. I nudged her backward a few steps to the shelf behind her, rocking my hips into the cradle of hers. Her eyes went wide and she bit her lip, letting out a soft whimper.
We dove into another kiss when she arched closer and tugged my mouth down, whispering, “More.”
“That’s my girl,” I teased, smiling against her mouth.
We broke apart moments later, both gasping for air. The sound of footsteps punctured the haze. I stepped back, clearing my throat. “So you just need your regular winter boots, something warm up top, and some kind of wind pants over those leggings.” I eyed her fleece leggings, which, fuck me, I loved that she wore those every day. She had a whole rainbow of colors. “Good socks too.”
She was a little breathless when she replied, “Okay.” She all but ran out of the gear room.
Asher appeared in the doorway a moment later. “Hey. In all honesty, if you want me to go with you, I will.”
I shrugged. “It’s not a long hike. Just two hours. Chloe wants to go, so she might as well learn.” My own voice was a little breathless.
Asher eyed me for a beat, and if he picked up on my tension, he didn’t comment. He simply said, “All right, it’ll be fun for her.” He turned to walk out of the gear room but stopped and turned back. “It’s good to have you home.”
“I’ve been here more than a minute,” I pointed out dryly.
“Let me clarify. It’s good to see you looking—” he paused, “—lighter.”
The moment felt briefly heavy, but it passed. “Thanks. It feels good to be that way. I appreciate you not tiptoeing around it.”
That was part of what had been so hard about coming home. I loved my family, and they loved me, and that was a gift not everybody got in life. But I’d been prepared for them to tiptoe around all of it. I’d even discussed it with my therapist before coming home. We talked about how when big things happened, even the people that loved you sometimes made it harder. Denial was a coping skill, she had pointed out, maybe not the healthiest, but definitely one.
My mom’s tendency was to be open about everything, and I knew it chafed at her to try to be cautious with me. Lately, it felt like that tension was finally starting to ease, because I was doing okay. It still sucked. Our sister had died, and I’d tried to save her and been too late. I would forever replay that. But I was trying to come to terms with it, to remember that I couldn’t change the ending, only accept it and stop beating myself up over it.
Asher surprised me when he took two quick strides closer and pulled me into a fierce hug. “Catch you later.” He backed up toward the hallway, stopping at the doorway. “Also, it’s obvious you have a thing for Chloe.”
“Fuck you,” I called as his sly laugh followed him down the hallway.
He was not wrong. I’d been kind of irritated at how much I wanted her for months, if I was being honest. Ever since I’d finally given in and kissed her again, I had accepted my fate.
My mom would do cartwheels and start planning a wedding if she knew, so I didn’t dare talk about it. But the joy and lightness Chloe carried with her was something I hadn’t realized I needed until she walked into my life with her clipboard and her color-coded lists. Not that I expected her to forge my own happiness for me. Yet, I savored how she exuded warmth and spark and unguarded enthusiasm.
My mind wandered back to when I walked into the kitchen and found her crying. My heart ached a little. I needed to know who the fuck was texting her, and I needed the backstory. But meanwhile, I would happily be her overprotective fake boyfriend via text, and maybe someday she would let me do it for real.
Moments later, she reappeared in the gear room doorway, bright-eyed, and the morning got busy. Getting everyone geared up, going through the guest list, sorting through every last detail, all of it moved with an easy, comfortable rhythm. As we worked side by side running through the checklist, she glanced over at me with her pink cheeks and her smile and the tightness in my chest eased.
Chapter Eighteen
Lincoln
Boulders are bullies
Our group set out directly behind Heartfire Falls Resort, following a nice loop on our property that extended up into a protected area. Once we got going, Chloe commented, “Okay, on the one hand, this is easy. On the other, I can see that I’m going to be sore.”
I chuckled. “Yeah, you’re going to want a hot bath tonight.” Of course, the instant I said that, I envisioned her in said hot bath, her skin flushed all over. I wanted to be in that bath with her.
