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“You don’t need to do that.”
“I want to do it.”
“I’ll think about it.” I rolled my eyes.
“What’s her last text? Let me see.”
I handed him the phone. He held it up for me to unlock it with my face and then tapped to open her last text. “What’s her name?”
“Lara.”
“I hate that name,” he replied.
I snorted. “Really?”
“With a passion.” He was still holding onto my hand and scrolled through to find her text with one thumb. “What a sob story. She’s sad.” His tone was dismissive.
“What does it say?” I couldn’t help but ask.
“You need to understand how sorry I am. I regret everything. I lost so many of our friends. I don’t know what to do. Blah, blah, blah, blah. You were always going to be my first choice as a godmother.” His eyes whipped up to mine. “Oh, my fucking God.”
I rolled my own. “I know. It’s ridiculous.”
“Can I reply, please?”
“Yes. But only if you keep holding my hand.”
He held my gaze, warmth flaring in his eyes. “Of course.” He set my phone down on the table and tapped with one finger.
“Tell me what you’re saying before you hit send.”
“This is Chloe’s fiancé,” he began.
“Oh, we’re engaged now?”
“Hell, yeah. She needs to feel like shit and a little jealous.” He continued reading me his text to her. “I know the whole story. You don’t deserve her friendship. And you’re right, you will regret this for the rest of your life. Leave Chloe alone. She never, ever, ever deserved what you did. But then no one would. Fuck all the way off.” He showed me the screen. “Can I hit send?”
I snorted a laugh. “I guess.”
“Should I block this number now?” he asked after tapping send.
“I don’t care. I really don’t. I know she’ll just try to reach out another way. Or maybe she’ll finally leave me alone.”
He pushed my phone away, curling both palms around my hand again. “I’m sorry about your baby.”
“Thank you,” I whispered. “It’s such a weird thing.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, um, people don’t like to talk about it. Because it’s almost like they think they’re going to be jinxed, even if they don’t want to have kids. I understand. It’s totally not the same thing, and I want to make that clear, but that’s how people are about your sister too. I think with big, painful things, it freaks people out. It’s too uncomfortable for them to face.”
“I wish that hadn’t happened to you.” he said quietly.
I swallowed and took another deep breath. “Jesus, enough with the deep breaths,” I said aloud.
His lips curled at the corners. “Breathing is kind of important.”
“So that’s why I have trouble sleeping,” I added after a few beats of quiet.
