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“I’ve got you.” His hand slides between us, thumb on my clit, in time with his hips. “I know. Let me feel it.”
For a minute neither of us moves. I run my hands down his back and feel the tremor go out of him in pieces, his breathing coming back against my skin, his weight settling heavier as he stops holding himself up. The kitchen is quiet except for the fridge and the both of us. My thighs are shaking where they’re hooked around him.
He pulls out carefully. I feel empty and used and a little sore already—that full stretch that means I’m going to feel him when I sit down later.
I watch him tug the condom off, tie it, and toss it in the trash. He doesn’t go far. He comes back and brackets my hips with his hands, thumbs stroking the insides of my knees like he’s checking I’m still in one piece.
“You good?” he asks, low.
“Mm.” I nod, and he helps me down off the counter, steadying me when my legs don’t quite want to hold. He gathers my clothes off the floor and I lean into him while I step back into my leggings, his hands warm at my waist, tugging them up for me.
The quiet stretches. My pulse is still loud in my ears, and the question that’s been sitting under my tongue all morning finally has room.
“How many more kids do you want?” I ask softly.
He pauses, one hand still on my hip. “What?”
“More kids.” I hop back up onto the counter so I can look at him properly, my palms braced behind me.
“I don’t know,” he says, tucking himself back into his sweatpants. He steps in between my knees without thinking about it. “As many as you want to give me.”
I hesitate, then say it quieter. “I was thinking… maybe another soon?”
His eyes narrow, studying me. “Is this because of Veronica?”
Heat blooms across my cheeks. “No. Well—not directly. I want another. I really do. I want Theo to have a sibling before he gets too old to really enjoy playing together. But Veronica being pregnant made me start thinking about it more. That Theo’s going to have a sibling that isn’t mine.”
Something shifts in his face. His jaw tightens, and for a second he looks like the thought has only just landed—that this baby, if it’s his, won’t just be another kid of his. It’ll be Theo’s brother or sister. Half of him, and half of someone else entirely.
He swallows and sets his hands on the counter on either side of my hips, boxing me in. “We can try whenever you feel is right,” he murmurs, then adds with a small smirk, “Well. Maybe after we get married? I don’t want your brothers and your dad killing me for getting you pregnant again before there’s a ring on your finger.”
I giggle, the sound light between us. “It’s just a piece of paper.”
He huffs. “No, sweet girl.” He catches my chin between his fingers, tilting my face up. “Not when it’s your name next to mine.”
My eyes search his for a beat. “What if it’s a girl?”
He blinks. “What do you mean?”
“I’ve been thinking about it a lot.” My fingers trace idle circles on his forearm. “I’ve kind of accepted that you’ll have another child with someone else. I just… what if it’s a girl. I don’t know. That feels different than if it was another boy.”
He swallows and brushes his thumb along my jaw. “Yeah,” he murmurs. “It does feel different.”
I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding. Relief loosens something in my chest—he didn’t brush it off, didn’t tell me I was being ridiculous. He just stands there between my knees, forehead tipped toward mine, and listens to my concerns.
Down the hall, Theo starts coughing. Wet, ragged, the kind that pulls both of us upright at once.
Simon doesn’t move right away.
“Hey.” He pulls my attention back to him. “You want another one with me? We can do that. After there’s a ring on your finger, if I get a say.”
Theo coughs again, harder this time. It's followed by a whimper that means he's waking up.
Simon exhales, presses his mouth to my temple, and lingers a second longer before he steps away. “I’ll go get him. He’s due for his next dose.”
I stay on the counter, listening to his footsteps fade down the hall. His voice drops into a softer register when he reaches Theo—I can't make out everything he's saying.
I made the right choice. Staying. Standing beside him through all of this with Veronica, even if Jamie never sees it that way. Simon has been here for me in a way I never thought he could. He isn’t the man he used to be—and I’d be a fool to walk away from the one I always wanted him to become.